1. Last night, when Saku didn't want to sleep and his dad was insisting, Saku asks Jeshu - "Whats your Pommel man?" (whats your problem man!) in typically his daddy's style. :-)
2. The other day, on seeing the "Dhoni-imitating-Rajni" advertisement, Sahil says, "Dey Rascal" in such a cute way that I wished I didn't have to stop him from using the word. :-(
3. This morning, when his Dad left with him for school without taking his rain-jacket, Sahil tells me: "Sahil like rain, sahil like to get wet, papa also like rain know?" as I was mumbling that it might rain, what would he do.
4. I try to scare the little fellow with an imaginary "Budda baba" sometimes. Because we don't want him to be a Scared Cat, he has also been told, if he behaves well, Papa will beat up the "Budda baba". When Sahil gets angry over something, sometimes he says, "You wait. Budda baba come and beat you nicely." Or he talks to Budda Baba as, "Budda baba, come soon. Mummy not putting Tom and Jerry know. Take mummy and go to your house." :-))
5. Ask Sahil the time and we get one of the following answers: "10.30", "8.30". Today he gave a very nice one - "30.40", trying to impress urgency that I was already creating while dressing him for school.
6. As it becomes late to put Saku to bed almost everyday, I push aside the bed-time story reading sometimes. Last night, inspite of it having been beyond the bed-time, I took the initiative of reading "Pit, Pat, Pet and the Naughty Giant" with Saku. Guess what my son asks surprised (after we finish reading) - "Mumma, Tomorrow Holidayyyyyy?" :-) I had to explain its a working day tomorrow and we can't stay up late everyday. He again asks me, "Mumma not tieeeuuuudddhh today?" (mumma not Tired today). I love him!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
On Falling - Out of Love
This is a poem that I had written many years ago, when someone I knew had a break-up. As I saw the person tearing apart to take the final steps...I wrote the lines. I happened to read this again recently (pulled some books out of the attic), and I felt, its much more relevant in today's times, when sadly, most of the relationships are becoming 'temporary arrangements'. :-(
Not Anymore
I have been so confused
and for so long,
now, I don't know
whether the confusion
will end here
or, Go On.
I had been believing that I was in love,
the type in which
deep sighs were spared
and salty tears abhorred.
But now, after all this
which you have seen me suffer
and much more you didn't know
I went through,
I know better:
I am not in Love,
Not Anymore.
I had always believed
you would respond
even to my slightest call,
But I proved myself wrong.
When I have been screaming,
you said, you don't hear
Anymore.
When did the Love end?
I can't point.
Is there any other chance?
I can't say.
But for now,
its best we,
part our way.
There is something else
I want you to know,
I can't say so,
but we both know:
How much responsible each one
of Us is, for all this...
and much more.
I took so long
to understand you didn't need me,
after having found
your different destination.
I don't want to
tag myself along
like a Candle-light;
when you reach out
to pick your star.
I thought being there
forever beside you
was the Ultimate Joy
I had been looking for.
I was wrong.
Not Anymore.
I never imagined
that you would leave me
and walk alone.
I had been so sure
of the security which
our Togetherness brought along.
But I guess, I had
been foolish enough
not to see the storm
which swept me off my feet,
and I was left empty-handed,
stupified and exasperated.
Inspite of all this,
I still thought I was in love,
even though I was devastated.
But now,
I know better:
I am not in Love,
Not Anymore.
I have always been
getting webbed within
the valley of thoughts
but no more.
I have been indecisive
for a long span of time
but no more.
My confusion gave way
to intensive soul-search
and the painful probation,
has led me to
even more painful conclusion.
I was unable to realize,
I did not have courage to make a decision.
But No More.
I thought our Love
was an undying one.
I believed no one grows...
out of Love:
but You proved me wrong.
And now I am at a crossroad,
where I know, I have to put a Stop.
I can't go on.
I am not in Love.
Not Anymore.
Not Anymore
I have been so confused
and for so long,
now, I don't know
whether the confusion
will end here
or, Go On.
I had been believing that I was in love,
the type in which
deep sighs were spared
and salty tears abhorred.
But now, after all this
which you have seen me suffer
and much more you didn't know
I went through,
I know better:
I am not in Love,
Not Anymore.
I had always believed
you would respond
even to my slightest call,
But I proved myself wrong.
When I have been screaming,
you said, you don't hear
Anymore.
When did the Love end?
I can't point.
Is there any other chance?
I can't say.
But for now,
its best we,
part our way.
There is something else
I want you to know,
I can't say so,
but we both know:
How much responsible each one
of Us is, for all this...
and much more.
I took so long
to understand you didn't need me,
after having found
your different destination.
I don't want to
tag myself along
like a Candle-light;
when you reach out
to pick your star.
I thought being there
forever beside you
was the Ultimate Joy
I had been looking for.
I was wrong.
Not Anymore.
I never imagined
that you would leave me
and walk alone.
I had been so sure
of the security which
our Togetherness brought along.
But I guess, I had
been foolish enough
not to see the storm
which swept me off my feet,
and I was left empty-handed,
stupified and exasperated.
Inspite of all this,
I still thought I was in love,
even though I was devastated.
But now,
I know better:
I am not in Love,
Not Anymore.
I have always been
getting webbed within
the valley of thoughts
but no more.
I have been indecisive
for a long span of time
but no more.
My confusion gave way
to intensive soul-search
and the painful probation,
has led me to
even more painful conclusion.
I was unable to realize,
I did not have courage to make a decision.
But No More.
I thought our Love
was an undying one.
I believed no one grows...
out of Love:
but You proved me wrong.
And now I am at a crossroad,
where I know, I have to put a Stop.
I can't go on.
I am not in Love.
Not Anymore.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Daily Meditation For Women - WIIIFM
*WIIIFM - What's In It For Me....
God has His Own way of answering some of our questions. Just as I was wondering, if I need to change...there is this meditation message in my Inbox on "Taking a Chance".
God has His Own way of answering some of our questions. Just as I was wondering, if I need to change...there is this meditation message in my Inbox on "Taking a Chance".
** I am adding today's meditation with their Copyright info here, to let my reader's know what they stand to gain by subscribing to "Daily Message" from "Meditations for Women".
*** To enrol yourself, use the hyperlinked image below the "Daily Messages to Empower Yourself" text (on the right side).
Why Can't I be just - Noddy
Yeah, must learn to become Noddy. ;-) Anything assigned? Nod. Anything re-routed? Nod. Anything stalled? Raise a concern but remember to Nod. Being asked to go against the rules? Think. Question. Confirm. Nod. Being asked to create history? Nod. Being asked to Erase History? Nod. Being asked to involve someone else? Nod. Being asked not to clarify your point of view? Nod. Being asked to generate Reports? Nod. You want to differ with someone? Nod (no need to differ). You want to offer suggestion? Nod (No one needs it). Someone not willing to decide? Nod.
Nodding is the only way up? Thanks Noddy. Sometimes your philosophy makes life grind less-stressful.
Nodding is the only way up? Thanks Noddy. Sometimes your philosophy makes life grind less-stressful.
What To Do When...
1. Someone whom you think a Friend, proves you wrong?
2. Someone whom you trust, chooses not to trust you?
3. Someone whom you discuss things with, prefers to avoid sharing important decisions?
4. Someone whom you expect to understand you and value you by creating bonds, walks over you as a surprise?
Only things left to do is:
(a) Avoid blaming yourself or the other person.
(b) Avoid feeling pained even if intentionally hurt.
(c) Overlook what happened and go your way.
(d) Look for what lies beneath and correct yourself (even if you can't spot what went wrong)
(e) Most importantly, do not estimate your worth by such incidents. :-) People come, people go, life still goes on.
(f) Don't look for answers. All questions do not have answers.
2. Someone whom you trust, chooses not to trust you?
3. Someone whom you discuss things with, prefers to avoid sharing important decisions?
4. Someone whom you expect to understand you and value you by creating bonds, walks over you as a surprise?
Only things left to do is:
(a) Avoid blaming yourself or the other person.
(b) Avoid feeling pained even if intentionally hurt.
(c) Overlook what happened and go your way.
(d) Look for what lies beneath and correct yourself (even if you can't spot what went wrong)
(e) Most importantly, do not estimate your worth by such incidents. :-) People come, people go, life still goes on.
(f) Don't look for answers. All questions do not have answers.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
His Japanese-Styled Hindi
That's exactly how my bro describes the basic 'hindi' that my son speaks. Japanese-Hindi :-)
His gender-mixed sentences are good. Wanna capture some of the 'beautiful phrases' he has spilt recently...
1. The other day, when Sahil got irritated with me not letting him come into the wahsroom while I was washing clothes; he stares at me and says, "thahher ja. batati hoon main tujhey." (Hold on, I will tell you.) Thats something I use rarely for Sahil, just to give him a feel that I have got irritated with what he did.
2. On seeing my bro's bike in their compound and not finding my bro in his house (bro was hiding), the little fellow asked my mum, "Naani, Maamu kahan gayi?" (where has mamu (in sense - she) gone?) My bro was caught laughing.
3. While doing home-work, Sahil suddenly pulls the eraser and says - "main karoongi". (I will do - feminine)
4. When he is trying to impress me with something that he remembers I have asked him not to do, he says - "Main aisay karoongi toh mummy marengay" (If I do like this (feminine), mummy will beat me (plural))
His gender-mixed sentences are good. Wanna capture some of the 'beautiful phrases' he has spilt recently...
1. The other day, when Sahil got irritated with me not letting him come into the wahsroom while I was washing clothes; he stares at me and says, "thahher ja. batati hoon main tujhey." (Hold on, I will tell you.) Thats something I use rarely for Sahil, just to give him a feel that I have got irritated with what he did.
2. On seeing my bro's bike in their compound and not finding my bro in his house (bro was hiding), the little fellow asked my mum, "Naani, Maamu kahan gayi?" (where has mamu (in sense - she) gone?) My bro was caught laughing.
3. While doing home-work, Sahil suddenly pulls the eraser and says - "main karoongi". (I will do - feminine)
4. When he is trying to impress me with something that he remembers I have asked him not to do, he says - "Main aisay karoongi toh mummy marengay" (If I do like this (feminine), mummy will beat me (plural))
Sour Grapes?
As Sahil was slowly munching Grapes last evening, his dad asked him - "Why are you eating grapes so slowly?" We thought maybe his grapes were sour. Pat came the reply, "Grapes havin' Bones know, that's why I am eatingh slowly. " We realized, we had bought big green grapes which were not seed-less. :-))
Monday, July 28, 2008
Un-Learning Corporate Skills
Yeah, the title of this post is a little absurd.... This is not a "Guide to Dealing Professionally", incase you thought it was. I am just going to add my Reminder Points (so I can look them up again) - picked up over the jobs I held until now and the roles I have seen people play. :-) The Number One rule is my favourite, though I never agreed with it personally in my younger days. :-))
1. There is no place for any emotions in the Workplace. (Your Tears ... fears ... sentiments ... and feelings are better placed elsewhere).
2. Do not expect anything from anyone. Its easier said than done, but I guess, this is the best way to avoid being pained for anything.
3. Share only about yourself. Even by mistake, do not share your opinion of anyone - however close your-so-called-friends may make you feel. That way, you save yourself 2 pains - One - Of having said something you shouldn't have and Two - Of having shared something with someone who may not even feel the way you do. :-) Opinions Change, Opinions Differ.
4. Remember, in the Corporate World, everyone is "More or Less - an Acquaintance". Do not work/worry/bother to create friendships. Who seems a friend today, may not be so, in the long run. Save yourself the trouble of saying what you feel like saying. Ask yourself - "Do I need to say anything at all?" before you open yourself to others.
5. Trust everyone equally. Special trust is Only for yourself, God and your Manager. ;-) Jus kidding. Observe how people deal with each other, what level of sharing they do. No harm in sharing your views on general topics. Anything personal, do you need to share?
6. Remember, You hold your position firstly because of the work you put in. Ensure you give your best there and better it each time you have something to do. Everything else is secondary.
7. Do not Value yourself based on other's opinion. Similarly, do not go by someone else's opinion for anyone. Find out for yourself. Start positively.
8. Last but most important. Look for the "Positive Forte's" of your colleagues. Try to imbibe the same and move on.
Officially - What I know, what I don't know --- no longer matters. I have matured, finally.
* Inspite of all my new wisdom, I have made profound friendships at my job places earlier. I value all of them. I have begun to change my thinking to the extent that, if an acquanitance has to move one step ahead and change into anything of value - it would happen. I do not have to go through the 'thought-process' of 'how good/bad a friend an acquaintance really is'. Be natural, be myself while I am here. Thats all that matters, right?
1. There is no place for any emotions in the Workplace. (Your Tears ... fears ... sentiments ... and feelings are better placed elsewhere).
2. Do not expect anything from anyone. Its easier said than done, but I guess, this is the best way to avoid being pained for anything.
3. Share only about yourself. Even by mistake, do not share your opinion of anyone - however close your-so-called-friends may make you feel. That way, you save yourself 2 pains - One - Of having said something you shouldn't have and Two - Of having shared something with someone who may not even feel the way you do. :-) Opinions Change, Opinions Differ.
4. Remember, in the Corporate World, everyone is "More or Less - an Acquaintance". Do not work/worry/bother to create friendships. Who seems a friend today, may not be so, in the long run. Save yourself the trouble of saying what you feel like saying. Ask yourself - "Do I need to say anything at all?" before you open yourself to others.
5. Trust everyone equally. Special trust is Only for yourself, God and your Manager. ;-) Jus kidding. Observe how people deal with each other, what level of sharing they do. No harm in sharing your views on general topics. Anything personal, do you need to share?
6. Remember, You hold your position firstly because of the work you put in. Ensure you give your best there and better it each time you have something to do. Everything else is secondary.
7. Do not Value yourself based on other's opinion. Similarly, do not go by someone else's opinion for anyone. Find out for yourself. Start positively.
8. Last but most important. Look for the "Positive Forte's" of your colleagues. Try to imbibe the same and move on.
Officially - What I know, what I don't know --- no longer matters. I have matured, finally.
* Inspite of all my new wisdom, I have made profound friendships at my job places earlier. I value all of them. I have begun to change my thinking to the extent that, if an acquanitance has to move one step ahead and change into anything of value - it would happen. I do not have to go through the 'thought-process' of 'how good/bad a friend an acquaintance really is'. Be natural, be myself while I am here. Thats all that matters, right?
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Doing Homework with Maamu
For few 'd' letters that my son was to complete as Home-Work yesterday, he allowed my bro to guide his palm. As if he had had enough, Sahil suddenly changed plates. Asking my bro to hold the pencil, Sahil states - "Maamu, see poperly. I am Miss. Hold the pencil, now make like this, do like that. Sahil teach now know. You do like that only. Okay. Don't make NAYKES." I was aghast at hearing 'don't make Naykes' as I had jokingly told Sahil sometime earlier that when he writes independently, his letter 'd' looks like snake. My son is mastering the art of catching words before they spill out of our mouths!
My bro declared that Sahil can do his homework after going to his house. :-))
My bro declared that Sahil can do his homework after going to his house. :-))
Our Trip to Kannur
Saturday Morning (12July) had made an un-planned trip to Kannur as my father-in-law was hospitalized. By God's grace, he is much better now and recovering. Wish to summarize the activities my son absorbed himself in, during the time...
1. The long hours at hospital taught my son to be relatively still. Every half an hour though, at the first opportunity, the little one would run out into the corridor. At one point, when he was too frisky, I tried telling him that the nurse would give him an injection. He retorted, "Biggg Injection? Nurse not give Sahil, sahil small boy know." :-)
2. Once home in Kerala, the huge space does wonders to uplift my spirits and how can then my littul one remain unaffected? He goes around exploring every nook and corner, especially the frontyard. He finds the 'Centipedes' and other worms. I remember, pervious trip, he had come to the kitchen and shown me - "Mumma, see 'Entipeeeede'" and when I turned trying to search the creature on the floor - Sahil opened his palm and revealed the crawly!!! I had made him drop that immediately (was scared about his safety) and admonished him from holding those.
Touching those.
This time around, he spotted some of them trying to go into a small fence like enclosure. Sadly, my growing up son chose to show his power to those help-less crawlies and stoned one before I could catch him doing that. Proudly, he comes running to me and says, "Mumma, Sahil beat that entipeeede. Entipeeede not moving now." I had to admonish him this time, against any such attacks, until he is in danger. Next morning, my son finds a group of Centipedes and goes as close as possible to them and shouts to me, "Mumma, see, Entipeeede coming to bite me. Sahil beat it now?". :-)) I was half-smiling when I moved him away and asked him to stand far, so they won't bite him and he doesn't get validity to repeat his stoning!
No wonder my Father-in-law was amused at his grandson's researches in his yard.
3. As work kept me busy, I had strictly told sahil to 'Watch your step, see where you are keeping your foot, otherwise you will fall down' while coming downstairs alone. One still afternoon, as I was cleaning dishes, my son announes, "Mumma, sahil coming down on stairs. No pommel (problem). Sahil coming slowly. I am seeing Mumma, where my foot going. sahil not fall down. Sahil not geth hut (get hurt)" :-)) I was thrilled to note that my words were saved in the little one's head atleast for the time being.
4. After returning back, while dressing him up for school I posed the question, "Saku, Your Maam will ask you why you did not come to school so many days. What will you tell Maam?" My sweet little monkey excitedly announces - "Sahil tell Maam - Sahil gone to Kerela know. Sahil played nicely." I was convinced his teacher is not going to trust that we rushed on long leave for a valid reason. :-(
1. The long hours at hospital taught my son to be relatively still. Every half an hour though, at the first opportunity, the little one would run out into the corridor. At one point, when he was too frisky, I tried telling him that the nurse would give him an injection. He retorted, "Biggg Injection? Nurse not give Sahil, sahil small boy know." :-)
2. Once home in Kerala, the huge space does wonders to uplift my spirits and how can then my littul one remain unaffected? He goes around exploring every nook and corner, especially the frontyard. He finds the 'Centipedes' and other worms. I remember, pervious trip, he had come to the kitchen and shown me - "Mumma, see 'Entipeeeede'" and when I turned trying to search the creature on the floor - Sahil opened his palm and revealed the crawly!!! I had made him drop that immediately (was scared about his safety) and admonished him from holding those.
Touching those.
This time around, he spotted some of them trying to go into a small fence like enclosure. Sadly, my growing up son chose to show his power to those help-less crawlies and stoned one before I could catch him doing that. Proudly, he comes running to me and says, "Mumma, Sahil beat that entipeeede. Entipeeede not moving now." I had to admonish him this time, against any such attacks, until he is in danger. Next morning, my son finds a group of Centipedes and goes as close as possible to them and shouts to me, "Mumma, see, Entipeeede coming to bite me. Sahil beat it now?". :-)) I was half-smiling when I moved him away and asked him to stand far, so they won't bite him and he doesn't get validity to repeat his stoning!
No wonder my Father-in-law was amused at his grandson's researches in his yard.
3. As work kept me busy, I had strictly told sahil to 'Watch your step, see where you are keeping your foot, otherwise you will fall down' while coming downstairs alone. One still afternoon, as I was cleaning dishes, my son announes, "Mumma, sahil coming down on stairs. No pommel (problem). Sahil coming slowly. I am seeing Mumma, where my foot going. sahil not fall down. Sahil not geth hut (get hurt)" :-)) I was thrilled to note that my words were saved in the little one's head atleast for the time being.
4. After returning back, while dressing him up for school I posed the question, "Saku, Your Maam will ask you why you did not come to school so many days. What will you tell Maam?" My sweet little monkey excitedly announces - "Sahil tell Maam - Sahil gone to Kerela know. Sahil played nicely." I was convinced his teacher is not going to trust that we rushed on long leave for a valid reason. :-(
Searching - Why My Blog Exists...
Why I write
Coz I like to. Truly, I don't know, its just that it comes with so much ease to pen down and there is always so much to write about. Just not enough time though. :-( The travails of a working life, the willingness to just drop everything and only live life each day - minus the 'Have-Tos".
What Your Comments Mean to Me
Ideally, one must not base her importance on the appreciation/criticism of another. :-) Of course, When it comes to writing, its important to know, what the 'Readers' think of it. Is it something they want to read? Is it something that they would like to come back to? Is it good enough to give them a sense of being, as that's basically what 'Writing' is about. Are they able to relate to what they read? (In that regard, my posts about my kiddo are worthless? I don't hope so! They make me feel good, is it only me who relates to those??)
Read somewhere - The Blog must have a Goal too. Not just our lives. Goal for a Blog? What's the Goal of my blog? This brings me back a whole circle to the question I posed myself - 'Why I write'? Why am I Blogging? Is it to prove to myself, I have not forgotten to capture emotions in words? Nay. To help my ever-fading memory? :-) Maybe. When did I start? Way back in my school-days? Yeah, that's when I wrote some poetry - partly imaginary and partly emotionally. Hmm...Turned to Haikus style for convenience. What did I write recently only for myself? For Father's Day - wrote a heart-felt poem for my papa, whom I miss more than I like to acknowledge. Time has taken him away earlier than I could return the care he showered...Where is this post heading? Its supposed to give me answer to the ultimate - why.
Coming back to that...I can write about almost anything. ;-) You tell me, what you like to read about? What do you look for - while Reading Blogs? I'll see how far I can mould my blog for that. Till then, its all going to me my kiddo and life as I see it. :-) keep Readin and lettin me know what You think of what U read!
How to Make My Blog Better
One thing, its all text presently. I must add some pics. Thats pending. What else will enhance the writing space? Your Comments. :-)) Maybe a little work is required on my Profile too. Template? I updated that recently. I read some valuable tips on improving Blog Value. Let me see if I can ensure sticking to the "Good-to-Do" tips. Your suggestions are welcome.
Coz I like to. Truly, I don't know, its just that it comes with so much ease to pen down and there is always so much to write about. Just not enough time though. :-( The travails of a working life, the willingness to just drop everything and only live life each day - minus the 'Have-Tos".
What Your Comments Mean to Me
Ideally, one must not base her importance on the appreciation/criticism of another. :-) Of course, When it comes to writing, its important to know, what the 'Readers' think of it. Is it something they want to read? Is it something that they would like to come back to? Is it good enough to give them a sense of being, as that's basically what 'Writing' is about. Are they able to relate to what they read? (In that regard, my posts about my kiddo are worthless? I don't hope so! They make me feel good, is it only me who relates to those??)
Read somewhere - The Blog must have a Goal too. Not just our lives. Goal for a Blog? What's the Goal of my blog? This brings me back a whole circle to the question I posed myself - 'Why I write'? Why am I Blogging? Is it to prove to myself, I have not forgotten to capture emotions in words? Nay. To help my ever-fading memory? :-) Maybe. When did I start? Way back in my school-days? Yeah, that's when I wrote some poetry - partly imaginary and partly emotionally. Hmm...Turned to Haikus style for convenience. What did I write recently only for myself? For Father's Day - wrote a heart-felt poem for my papa, whom I miss more than I like to acknowledge. Time has taken him away earlier than I could return the care he showered...Where is this post heading? Its supposed to give me answer to the ultimate - why.
Coming back to that...I can write about almost anything. ;-) You tell me, what you like to read about? What do you look for - while Reading Blogs? I'll see how far I can mould my blog for that. Till then, its all going to me my kiddo and life as I see it. :-) keep Readin and lettin me know what You think of what U read!
How to Make My Blog Better
One thing, its all text presently. I must add some pics. Thats pending. What else will enhance the writing space? Your Comments. :-)) Maybe a little work is required on my Profile too. Template? I updated that recently. I read some valuable tips on improving Blog Value. Let me see if I can ensure sticking to the "Good-to-Do" tips. Your suggestions are welcome.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Taaray Zameen Par and My Moon
Wonderful Movie, already acknowledged as a Class apart from the rest. I felt it is an eye-opener for parents, especially relevant in our times when the kids are mostly being marketed and showcased. The children being the soft targets of all advertisements and the pushy-parents who wish to see them soar (higher than their own achievements). Strange, how we parents seem to have started measuring our success as parents by the achievements we showcase of our kids. How tough it is to be a child in this Generation then! We grow with them, in a way... and am sure, many parents grew with this movie that brings alive the childhood, not just the needs of a special child.
Guess, its time to stand back and look at the world with the little ones, through their eyes; instead of forcing our glasses on them. Let them shade their own lens, let them build their own vision, let us just enhance what they see; not show them what we see/want them to see. Can we hold their little fingers and still walk in their pace, without pulling them to walk faster???
Leaving aside what I think of the movie, let me pen down how it touched my little one. Sahil loved the "Bum Chik" song. As most other kids, he doesn't like the 'Ma....' song where Enu cries. For few days, after we saw the movie, he was comparing himself to Enu. One day, I was surprised, when I was making him wear his shoes, he says, "Enu mummy make him wear shoes know!" I had almost forgotten the specific scene when she hurries him to school (I do that everyday too!) but yes, I was touched when my son remembered that.
Watching that movie has made me more aware of the 'childlike curiosity' that my son displays now and then. As it is, sometimes I feel, I am a very emotional parent. Seeing the world with Enu's eyes...was tough... but it has become much more beautiful ever since; as I stand and watch my son grow(instead of pushing and pulling him). I am learning to give in to my child's demands to tie his shoes himself, eat his food himself even though all it takes is a little time and spill-over. :-) I want him to grow at his own pace. As Aamir says, "Every little ant carries the load according to himself".
I have mostly shown the Moon to Sahil, unintentionally on Full Moon days. Looking at the moon few evenings ago, Sahil says in a little sad voice, "Mumma, see, Broken moon." :-) Had fun telling him, he will grow too!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Sishya School Fete - 5July2008
I was invited by a colleague whose kids are in Sishya, to take my son to the Fete held in their school. :-) I enjoyed the evening and yes, it brought back so many memories (of my school-days!) and helped me create fresh ones with my son...Here's the gist of all that came flooding to my head...
(a) Seeing the 'Young Kids' act older than their age was an amusing reminder of the way we have been same too, long ago. :-) The thought that they too would soon outgrow being 'their age' was painful somewhere.
(b) Even funnier was to see, we grown-ups tryin to feel/behave younger than we are. :-))
(c) There was this long queue for 'Tatoo' for the kids and a fresh-looking high-school girl waiting to get a 'Scorpion' done on her face. :-) While waiting for his turn, my son waivered between 'Power Ranger' - 'Batman' - 'Spiderman' and returned to original choice 'Power Ranger' just when our chance came. I was glad, I didn't have to waste the maker's time while my son tried to decide!
(d) Even the small girls prove they are 'Girls' and boys prove they are 'Boys' by selecting 'Butterflies" and "Spiderman" respectively...
(e) The 'Pony Ride' - The 'Pony' was much more of a 'Horse' than a Pony! I considered my tiny little one, and the Horse seemed 8-10 times Sahil's size...it didn't take me long to back-off from the ride. At that minute, wished Sahil's dad was with us so I could unhesitatingly push the little fellow forward. Moral Support!
(f) Wanted to get my Hair 'Streaked' and the little one's 'Styled' but the crowd was HUGE in both the stalls. I was sure, had we tried to get a turn; my hair and Sahil's would have been 'pulled in all directions' and may not even be on our heads eventually! :-) Gave it a glance and a pass.
(g) Merry-go-round was 'rounding-off' at such a speed that I felt dizzy watching other children on it. I asked Sahil if he wanted to go on that, he said - "No. Mumma." :-)
(f) I always thought my son would like Cotton Candy...he didn't! :-) Tried spitting it out (like he does with food thats not of his liking) and messed his mouth. :-)
(g) Bullock-Cart Ride - This was the 'Star Item'. Paid for it and made my son comfortably sit in the traditionally covered cart. The cart had some windows and Lo! within a minute my son jumped into my lap through the window. He felt the two Bulls in the front would take him somewhere away from me. Missed the first round - as he was not willing to sit - until he understood the extent of the ride!
While the cart made the First Round, I tried boosting his confidence by making him understand that they would return to where I was standing. Second round, he allowed me to seat him again. Just when the ride began, his wailing too!! Before I could decide how to handle him (as I didn't want him to miss the experience)...the Bullock-Cart Ride agent started requesting me to join my son for the ride! I felt foolish for a second, but then thought, if he doesn't have a problem - why am I thinking so much! Just got into the Cart and all the little ones turned to acknowledge the grown-up by their side. My son - ofcourse, was the happiest. :-) As I was beginning to feel at ease, my colleague spots me adjusting myself inside the cart and announces - "I don't think the Ride is for the Parents!" I wished, I could vanish. :-))
One saving grace was, the silly thought in my head - "What all the kids make their parents do!"
;-)
(h) Birds and Animals - This was fun. Sahil tried to catch the two ducks and was amused at hear their sound. We saw birds, parrot (it even sat on my shoulder, Sahil was scared!), cats/Kittens and Rabbits! :-)
Overall, a Big Thanks to S for inviting us to the Fete. :-)
(a) Seeing the 'Young Kids' act older than their age was an amusing reminder of the way we have been same too, long ago. :-) The thought that they too would soon outgrow being 'their age' was painful somewhere.
(b) Even funnier was to see, we grown-ups tryin to feel/behave younger than we are. :-))
(c) There was this long queue for 'Tatoo' for the kids and a fresh-looking high-school girl waiting to get a 'Scorpion' done on her face. :-) While waiting for his turn, my son waivered between 'Power Ranger' - 'Batman' - 'Spiderman' and returned to original choice 'Power Ranger' just when our chance came. I was glad, I didn't have to waste the maker's time while my son tried to decide!
(d) Even the small girls prove they are 'Girls' and boys prove they are 'Boys' by selecting 'Butterflies" and "Spiderman" respectively...
(e) The 'Pony Ride' - The 'Pony' was much more of a 'Horse' than a Pony! I considered my tiny little one, and the Horse seemed 8-10 times Sahil's size...it didn't take me long to back-off from the ride. At that minute, wished Sahil's dad was with us so I could unhesitatingly push the little fellow forward. Moral Support!
(f) Wanted to get my Hair 'Streaked' and the little one's 'Styled' but the crowd was HUGE in both the stalls. I was sure, had we tried to get a turn; my hair and Sahil's would have been 'pulled in all directions' and may not even be on our heads eventually! :-) Gave it a glance and a pass.
(g) Merry-go-round was 'rounding-off' at such a speed that I felt dizzy watching other children on it. I asked Sahil if he wanted to go on that, he said - "No. Mumma." :-)
(f) I always thought my son would like Cotton Candy...he didn't! :-) Tried spitting it out (like he does with food thats not of his liking) and messed his mouth. :-)
(g) Bullock-Cart Ride - This was the 'Star Item'. Paid for it and made my son comfortably sit in the traditionally covered cart. The cart had some windows and Lo! within a minute my son jumped into my lap through the window. He felt the two Bulls in the front would take him somewhere away from me. Missed the first round - as he was not willing to sit - until he understood the extent of the ride!
While the cart made the First Round, I tried boosting his confidence by making him understand that they would return to where I was standing. Second round, he allowed me to seat him again. Just when the ride began, his wailing too!! Before I could decide how to handle him (as I didn't want him to miss the experience)...the Bullock-Cart Ride agent started requesting me to join my son for the ride! I felt foolish for a second, but then thought, if he doesn't have a problem - why am I thinking so much! Just got into the Cart and all the little ones turned to acknowledge the grown-up by their side. My son - ofcourse, was the happiest. :-) As I was beginning to feel at ease, my colleague spots me adjusting myself inside the cart and announces - "I don't think the Ride is for the Parents!" I wished, I could vanish. :-))
One saving grace was, the silly thought in my head - "What all the kids make their parents do!"
;-)
(h) Birds and Animals - This was fun. Sahil tried to catch the two ducks and was amused at hear their sound. We saw birds, parrot (it even sat on my shoulder, Sahil was scared!), cats/Kittens and Rabbits! :-)
Overall, a Big Thanks to S for inviting us to the Fete. :-)
Willing to Sell property to Vegetarians Only!
What? Huh? Did I read it correctly? ... yeah, I thought the same things when I saw the online 'Flat Sale Advertisement' of some of the flats in Chennai. I don't understand the rationale behind such a criterion. In what ways would Non-vegetarians be not-the-right property buyers? I can understand the 'vegetarian-oriented sentiments' of a house-owner if the property is 'For Rent' and the Owner resides in the same premises. But while 'Selling' off the same, looking or rather opting to look only at the Vegetarianism of the Buyer...sets me thinking.
Do Vegetarians make better buyers? Better property keepers? Are lesser violent in case of discrepancies ;-) ? Why the favouritism? What if the kids of the so-called-vegetarian family turn non-vegetarian years from now? :-)
Keep the comments coming, if you have an answer...
Do Vegetarians make better buyers? Better property keepers? Are lesser violent in case of discrepancies ;-) ? Why the favouritism? What if the kids of the so-called-vegetarian family turn non-vegetarian years from now? :-)
Keep the comments coming, if you have an answer...
June End Updates
1. Went to temple with Hubby/son/Bro and Mum. Had instructed my son not to make noise while we go in to pray. He religiously behaved himself and I was happy that not even once, I had to say, "Sahil, don't make noise". :-) I was reminded he is afterall a kiddo, as while coming out of the temple gate, my son asks, "Sahil make sound now?"
2. The other day I was speaking to my bro over the phone and he asked if I wanted him to bring anything. Ofcourse sahil did not hear my bro's question, but he decoded the same from my answer - "No, I don't want anything". Almost immediately, my son says, "Maamu, sahil want to talk" and I handed over the phone to Sahil. He says, "maamu, bring bananas okay. Sahil like banana. Okay, Bye". No chance given to my brother to refuse!
2. The other day I was speaking to my bro over the phone and he asked if I wanted him to bring anything. Ofcourse sahil did not hear my bro's question, but he decoded the same from my answer - "No, I don't want anything". Almost immediately, my son says, "Maamu, sahil want to talk" and I handed over the phone to Sahil. He says, "maamu, bring bananas okay. Sahil like banana. Okay, Bye". No chance given to my brother to refuse!
Friday, July 4, 2008
Letter to S - On Entering New Relationship
* This was a letter that I had originally written for a close friend who was apprehensive about her approaching wedding. :-) Also, passed this on to some other friends who valued and appreciated the same in their trial times... Wasn't sure if I wanted to add it to my Blog, but still...here it is.
Dear S,
This is going to be a Big Mail. I'll try to put all that I have felt, learnt in my marriage to help you feel more secured, more confident that you can handle it all well. :-)
One, I wish to share something with you. Inspite of it being an awaited relationship, we also faced some trials in the early days of my marriage. Believe me, even in love marriages, one does come across small-small things… after all, married life itself has lots to teach and it’s a new experience for every individual.
I was not good at time-management…I have been quite slow irrespective of the fact that we had to be in office on time… After more than one year of togetherness, I have learnt a lot, as a wife, as a partner and biggest learning is….there is lots to learn each day and yes, I have consciously improved on points I had to get better at.
So, just in case, you come across small-small dissatisfactions/trials in your daily life, please remember and focus on the fact that marriage is a lovely relationship and its worth doing all you can for maintaining happiness / balance and love in the same. You may face some petty differences, which when occur seem biggest things!!! But are actually not, if you look at them objectively. Be prepared to make your home a nice place to be – atleast for the bonds that matter.
Two, take good care of yourself and your hubby, take time out for yourself and him, don’t be too demanding, put forth your view with love …… and life would be not just easy, but also enjoyable.
As a friend, I pray you have a life-long loving relationship with your partner (that way life would never feel overpowering…it would just be nice to live).
Three, I request, whatever your trials, please do not discuss it with anyone who can’t help, except someone whom you can trust to advise well and still be quiet about it. It not only can give a bad impression about your hubby (which deep inside we women don’t like to) but also about in the ways you are ruining your relationship.
Four, I want you to understand that for almost a year now, you both will be in the phase of getting to know each-other. Your understanding phase also starts the day you marry… and yes, please note, we all are not perfect. It is good to strive for perfection in ourselves and others, but please set realistic expectations, if at all you set any.
Five, it becomes your responsibility to communicate and convey your feelings to each-other. This is most important when something troubles you but as a Golden Rule, if you are comfortable communicating without hurting, your marriage will go a long way. Believe me, that’s half the trouble. We women like to believe, the men will understand hints or unspoken feelings. Trust me, how much ever a man might love you, if at all there is anything that makes you unhappy, until you convey it to him, he might not be even aware!! So, don't wait to open up only when things do not go your way... be open to communicate your daily life feelings (simple things like you might like if he holds your hand while crossing a road, and it in no way means you can't manage to cross it alone!).
Six, the good habits you both build together, the happy routine job that you both take up together, will make things nice however hectic the day. For example, you can make it a routine to apply paste on each-other's brushes first thing in the morning. Just the gesture can make both of you feel nice about the bonding. :-)
Seven, try to be nice partners for each-other. Find out what your likes/dislikes are. What does he look for in a partner? What do you look for in a partner to be open and loving towards him? Discuss about your feelings and how far you both can trust each-other, knowing the fact that it is an arranged marriage. Make your husband know you trust him and you want to know the nitty-gritty details about his office etc just to feel you both are partners in everything and not because you feel insecure. Most of the men, do not discuss office things at home….for various reasons. Some feel, it’s got nothing of interest for wife…especially if it’s a different culture at office……Please speak to your hubby lovingly. Don’t give him an essay of what you like, how you want him to be….just when he behaves in a way that makes you unhappy, let him know that you are unhappy. That doesn’t mean you stop eating, throw tantrums, keep sulking. Speak. And not rudely, be polite. Your anger should not be directed towards him but the behavior which makes you feel bad. Hope you understand.
Eight, please do not expect your husband to be like you. Don’t expect him to behave the way you do. Why should he? After all, he is a different person, right? In a way, we play our parts.
Nine, being romantic and doing things which create/highlight that particular feeling is a great beginning for a relationship. If you fear that he feels you are not so close to him, make him feel close to you. Show your affection towards him. Let him know you would be happy when he shows affection too… At times, there may be certain things you wish to talk to him openly about….but you may at the same time be holding on. It cud be that you don’t want to upset him. Then, if you think that what you wish to say, might upset him and if it’s trivial, just leave it, don’t say. But if you feel, it’s important for him to know, then speak to him. Don’t worry about how he takes it; just be there for him even when he gets upset (if you are taking the risk of telling him something that might upset him).
Ten, we all have a tendency to over-expect. But only with mutual understanding and the will to maintain love and peace between the partners, everything can be overcome. I can’t know your hubby’s nature, it’s for you to explore. You can’t change him, yes. But with your love and sweetness, you can still ask him to be sweet the way you like him to be….when he does something that makes you happy, tell him it makes you happy!! Not just whine each time he makes you unhappy. Give praise and honest view every time (now that doesn’t mean be cuttingly sharp when it can be avoided)…
Eleven, if you get bugged at home, in his absence, do things you think will be useful for both of you…or just read something of value…make it a habit to have some relaxation time for both of you everyday, let him know if he talks for ten-fifteen minutes before sleeping, you will feel good the entire day (next day)…..I am sure, when a person knows how he can keep his wife happy, he will try to do so. And also, you ask him how he would want you to be….that also will encourage him to be more open to you.
Twelve, don’t get hurt for small-small things (now this is easier said than done)…
Thirteen, anything tried with love and faith never fails. Just don’t think so much!!!! Just live!! And enjoy your special togetherness!!
Fourteen, you know, if we women can keep our tongues in control (trust me, we women can come up with the most devastating statements!!), it definitely will create a sweeter home (now this doesn’t go to say, we needn’t fight when wronged).
Fifteen, I keep reminding myself, what matters most is not how much time you spend together (that does matter, yes) but more importantly how you behave with each-other everyday….. and by God’s grace, we are also everyday learning how to manage things well (even issues we might slightly differ on)….without creating a racquet for it…..
Sixteen, life offers lots of opportunities to create fresh wounds and also, the methods to overcome those will differ each time. Not every time the other person can forgive as soon as you ask sorry. And Not every time you need to ask sorry, just a sweet smile and sentences like, “yes, I understand, I made a mistake, will improve on this” might help a great deal….besides, the willingness to change if need arises…for mutual happiness.
Seventeen, you must think things from his perspective also.
Eighteen, and nice if you realize, how small words can create profound wounds….so, be careful at all times. We all get angry, but you know, after a while, anger by itself fades out and then we might be left repenting what we said or did. So, always pray when angry. That really helps!!
Nineteen, each couple has their own trials and their own means of setting the rhythm of their lives… both must be quick at dissolving the differences. Small-small things affect every couple.
Twenty, in marriage, it's best not to wait for other person to come and apologize, even if one may think other was wrong! Don’t both want the love back? So why shouldn’t either be first to break ice? All this and much more…same way, there mite be times when wife is wrong and hubby waits for her to realize…if she realizes soon and is back to normal herself great….or she can always approach hubby…or vice versa..
Twenty-one, growing up has lots to do with changing and most of us don’t like to change. We think, why should we? Sometimes, changing ourselves little makes life much better…
Twenty-two, about you feeling emotionally down, now and then…well, that’s going to be part and parcel of first year of anyone’s marriage!! Trust me, I used to get terribly moody too and for no fault of his!!!! Believe me, it comes with hormonal changes and lots more ;-)
Twenty-three, please understand how much you love your hubby or he loves you, you both may still behave indifferent at times. It happens. Just like that. Without any reason. You know, we women attach lots of emotional drama to all our feelings, men are not like that. For them, simpler the life, the better it is. For us, until we find out reasons for each casual smile, each wink, each grin, each angry expression, each fluttering emotion….we are not satisfied!!! Read this. I used to make lot of long faces too and guess what? When I used to be upset for some silly thing, making a big long face over it, he would come and tell me something like, “already you have such a thin long face…you look horrible when you get angry”. I would feel like crying thinking that he is so heartless to say such a thing when I am so emotional…..but you know what? I learnt soon that he likes to irritate me when I am angry because he finds it too much to come and make me feel better (by begging me or asking me sorry-sorry especially when I am just moody) for small silly things. And, I have also understood, if he knows its something important and I am feeling sad/bad about it, he would be the first one to come running to make me feel nice.
Twenty-four, it is with experience that we all learn the true caring nature of the husband! Please do not fret easily, give you and him more chances to share more smiles. Please do not think he does not care, he does, maybe he can’t show it off very often. Especially, when we can be silly enough to take small things to heart, head, analyzing and fuming over them!!
Twenty-five, ensure that you remain happy and keep him happy. Don’t give importance to all things, only to those that are really important. We need to be able to differentiate. We take all things to heart. That’s not required. If your hubby loves you, enjoy that feeling. Don't worry about it!! When you feel much more secured about your mutual understanding, you will not worry so much.
Twenty-six, we can’t become emotionally strong like men, but of course, we can get our own emotional control higher. We can not stop feeling; we can learn to control and channelize the same.
Also, want to tell you, please don’t think all that I have mentioned above is the ultimate truth….you need to experience and grow on your own….and I am sure, though we are equally sentimental women, with time, you will also learn how best to tackle things which seem so out of order at times…..there’s lots to come with each passing day….
Marriage is not who is right, who is wrong but how to set wrongs right and how to be happy together. It doesn’t matter who needs to improve (half the times its both, men talk less about their improvements and women talk too much!!).
Just take care, I wish you enjoy the period that you are having now, after a year all trials now will seem like trifles …..
I guess, that’s enough for your entire first year of marriage. :-) Keep smiling and take one day at a time.
Regards,
Me.
Dear S,
This is going to be a Big Mail. I'll try to put all that I have felt, learnt in my marriage to help you feel more secured, more confident that you can handle it all well. :-)
One, I wish to share something with you. Inspite of it being an awaited relationship, we also faced some trials in the early days of my marriage. Believe me, even in love marriages, one does come across small-small things… after all, married life itself has lots to teach and it’s a new experience for every individual.
I was not good at time-management…I have been quite slow irrespective of the fact that we had to be in office on time… After more than one year of togetherness, I have learnt a lot, as a wife, as a partner and biggest learning is….there is lots to learn each day and yes, I have consciously improved on points I had to get better at.
So, just in case, you come across small-small dissatisfactions/trials in your daily life, please remember and focus on the fact that marriage is a lovely relationship and its worth doing all you can for maintaining happiness / balance and love in the same. You may face some petty differences, which when occur seem biggest things!!! But are actually not, if you look at them objectively. Be prepared to make your home a nice place to be – atleast for the bonds that matter.
Two, take good care of yourself and your hubby, take time out for yourself and him, don’t be too demanding, put forth your view with love …… and life would be not just easy, but also enjoyable.
As a friend, I pray you have a life-long loving relationship with your partner (that way life would never feel overpowering…it would just be nice to live).
Three, I request, whatever your trials, please do not discuss it with anyone who can’t help, except someone whom you can trust to advise well and still be quiet about it. It not only can give a bad impression about your hubby (which deep inside we women don’t like to) but also about in the ways you are ruining your relationship.
Four, I want you to understand that for almost a year now, you both will be in the phase of getting to know each-other. Your understanding phase also starts the day you marry… and yes, please note, we all are not perfect. It is good to strive for perfection in ourselves and others, but please set realistic expectations, if at all you set any.
Five, it becomes your responsibility to communicate and convey your feelings to each-other. This is most important when something troubles you but as a Golden Rule, if you are comfortable communicating without hurting, your marriage will go a long way. Believe me, that’s half the trouble. We women like to believe, the men will understand hints or unspoken feelings. Trust me, how much ever a man might love you, if at all there is anything that makes you unhappy, until you convey it to him, he might not be even aware!! So, don't wait to open up only when things do not go your way... be open to communicate your daily life feelings (simple things like you might like if he holds your hand while crossing a road, and it in no way means you can't manage to cross it alone!).
Six, the good habits you both build together, the happy routine job that you both take up together, will make things nice however hectic the day. For example, you can make it a routine to apply paste on each-other's brushes first thing in the morning. Just the gesture can make both of you feel nice about the bonding. :-)
Seven, try to be nice partners for each-other. Find out what your likes/dislikes are. What does he look for in a partner? What do you look for in a partner to be open and loving towards him? Discuss about your feelings and how far you both can trust each-other, knowing the fact that it is an arranged marriage. Make your husband know you trust him and you want to know the nitty-gritty details about his office etc just to feel you both are partners in everything and not because you feel insecure. Most of the men, do not discuss office things at home….for various reasons. Some feel, it’s got nothing of interest for wife…especially if it’s a different culture at office……Please speak to your hubby lovingly. Don’t give him an essay of what you like, how you want him to be….just when he behaves in a way that makes you unhappy, let him know that you are unhappy. That doesn’t mean you stop eating, throw tantrums, keep sulking. Speak. And not rudely, be polite. Your anger should not be directed towards him but the behavior which makes you feel bad. Hope you understand.
Eight, please do not expect your husband to be like you. Don’t expect him to behave the way you do. Why should he? After all, he is a different person, right? In a way, we play our parts.
Nine, being romantic and doing things which create/highlight that particular feeling is a great beginning for a relationship. If you fear that he feels you are not so close to him, make him feel close to you. Show your affection towards him. Let him know you would be happy when he shows affection too… At times, there may be certain things you wish to talk to him openly about….but you may at the same time be holding on. It cud be that you don’t want to upset him. Then, if you think that what you wish to say, might upset him and if it’s trivial, just leave it, don’t say. But if you feel, it’s important for him to know, then speak to him. Don’t worry about how he takes it; just be there for him even when he gets upset (if you are taking the risk of telling him something that might upset him).
Ten, we all have a tendency to over-expect. But only with mutual understanding and the will to maintain love and peace between the partners, everything can be overcome. I can’t know your hubby’s nature, it’s for you to explore. You can’t change him, yes. But with your love and sweetness, you can still ask him to be sweet the way you like him to be….when he does something that makes you happy, tell him it makes you happy!! Not just whine each time he makes you unhappy. Give praise and honest view every time (now that doesn’t mean be cuttingly sharp when it can be avoided)…
Eleven, if you get bugged at home, in his absence, do things you think will be useful for both of you…or just read something of value…make it a habit to have some relaxation time for both of you everyday, let him know if he talks for ten-fifteen minutes before sleeping, you will feel good the entire day (next day)…..I am sure, when a person knows how he can keep his wife happy, he will try to do so. And also, you ask him how he would want you to be….that also will encourage him to be more open to you.
Twelve, don’t get hurt for small-small things (now this is easier said than done)…
Thirteen, anything tried with love and faith never fails. Just don’t think so much!!!! Just live!! And enjoy your special togetherness!!
Fourteen, you know, if we women can keep our tongues in control (trust me, we women can come up with the most devastating statements!!), it definitely will create a sweeter home (now this doesn’t go to say, we needn’t fight when wronged).
Fifteen, I keep reminding myself, what matters most is not how much time you spend together (that does matter, yes) but more importantly how you behave with each-other everyday….. and by God’s grace, we are also everyday learning how to manage things well (even issues we might slightly differ on)….without creating a racquet for it…..
Sixteen, life offers lots of opportunities to create fresh wounds and also, the methods to overcome those will differ each time. Not every time the other person can forgive as soon as you ask sorry. And Not every time you need to ask sorry, just a sweet smile and sentences like, “yes, I understand, I made a mistake, will improve on this” might help a great deal….besides, the willingness to change if need arises…for mutual happiness.
Seventeen, you must think things from his perspective also.
Eighteen, and nice if you realize, how small words can create profound wounds….so, be careful at all times. We all get angry, but you know, after a while, anger by itself fades out and then we might be left repenting what we said or did. So, always pray when angry. That really helps!!
Nineteen, each couple has their own trials and their own means of setting the rhythm of their lives… both must be quick at dissolving the differences. Small-small things affect every couple.
Twenty, in marriage, it's best not to wait for other person to come and apologize, even if one may think other was wrong! Don’t both want the love back? So why shouldn’t either be first to break ice? All this and much more…same way, there mite be times when wife is wrong and hubby waits for her to realize…if she realizes soon and is back to normal herself great….or she can always approach hubby…or vice versa..
Twenty-one, growing up has lots to do with changing and most of us don’t like to change. We think, why should we? Sometimes, changing ourselves little makes life much better…
Twenty-two, about you feeling emotionally down, now and then…well, that’s going to be part and parcel of first year of anyone’s marriage!! Trust me, I used to get terribly moody too and for no fault of his!!!! Believe me, it comes with hormonal changes and lots more ;-)
Twenty-three, please understand how much you love your hubby or he loves you, you both may still behave indifferent at times. It happens. Just like that. Without any reason. You know, we women attach lots of emotional drama to all our feelings, men are not like that. For them, simpler the life, the better it is. For us, until we find out reasons for each casual smile, each wink, each grin, each angry expression, each fluttering emotion….we are not satisfied!!! Read this. I used to make lot of long faces too and guess what? When I used to be upset for some silly thing, making a big long face over it, he would come and tell me something like, “already you have such a thin long face…you look horrible when you get angry”. I would feel like crying thinking that he is so heartless to say such a thing when I am so emotional…..but you know what? I learnt soon that he likes to irritate me when I am angry because he finds it too much to come and make me feel better (by begging me or asking me sorry-sorry especially when I am just moody) for small silly things. And, I have also understood, if he knows its something important and I am feeling sad/bad about it, he would be the first one to come running to make me feel nice.
Twenty-four, it is with experience that we all learn the true caring nature of the husband! Please do not fret easily, give you and him more chances to share more smiles. Please do not think he does not care, he does, maybe he can’t show it off very often. Especially, when we can be silly enough to take small things to heart, head, analyzing and fuming over them!!
Twenty-five, ensure that you remain happy and keep him happy. Don’t give importance to all things, only to those that are really important. We need to be able to differentiate. We take all things to heart. That’s not required. If your hubby loves you, enjoy that feeling. Don't worry about it!! When you feel much more secured about your mutual understanding, you will not worry so much.
Twenty-six, we can’t become emotionally strong like men, but of course, we can get our own emotional control higher. We can not stop feeling; we can learn to control and channelize the same.
Also, want to tell you, please don’t think all that I have mentioned above is the ultimate truth….you need to experience and grow on your own….and I am sure, though we are equally sentimental women, with time, you will also learn how best to tackle things which seem so out of order at times…..there’s lots to come with each passing day….
Marriage is not who is right, who is wrong but how to set wrongs right and how to be happy together. It doesn’t matter who needs to improve (half the times its both, men talk less about their improvements and women talk too much!!).
Just take care, I wish you enjoy the period that you are having now, after a year all trials now will seem like trifles …..
I guess, that’s enough for your entire first year of marriage. :-) Keep smiling and take one day at a time.
Regards,
Me.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
First Homework
Yesterday was the first time my son came home with some Home Work. He had half a page each in Number Work and Alphabet. It was a different experience altogether ---- to hold his tiny palms in my hands, while he grips the pencil, trying to form the letter "c" and number "1" on the dotted lines. :-))
For C, I was trying to amuse him saying, 'make the head first, then the stomach"...(small letter c). He turns and looks at me and says, "it is C now". I wanted to share the same fun with hubby so was thinking if the little one would complete the whole thing at one go. I was wrong. Who can capture the interest of a littul one for longer than 5 mins at a stretch? :-) My mum failed too!
My son says, after forming letters in just two rows, "Mumma, sahil tiuhred (tired). My fingers paining." I was concerned but he puts my fears at rest when he jumps at his mamu and says, "Let's go shopping."
Hubby had his own experience trying to help Sahil do the home-work. No doubt he enjoyed it for a while, but eventually his patience gave in. At the end of it, hubby tells me - "we need a cook." As I look at him puzzled, he says, "So you can spend some more time with Sahil". :-))
For C, I was trying to amuse him saying, 'make the head first, then the stomach"...(small letter c). He turns and looks at me and says, "it is C now". I wanted to share the same fun with hubby so was thinking if the little one would complete the whole thing at one go. I was wrong. Who can capture the interest of a littul one for longer than 5 mins at a stretch? :-) My mum failed too!
My son says, after forming letters in just two rows, "Mumma, sahil tiuhred (tired). My fingers paining." I was concerned but he puts my fears at rest when he jumps at his mamu and says, "Let's go shopping."
Hubby had his own experience trying to help Sahil do the home-work. No doubt he enjoyed it for a while, but eventually his patience gave in. At the end of it, hubby tells me - "we need a cook." As I look at him puzzled, he says, "So you can spend some more time with Sahil". :-))
Men!!!!!
Guess what hubby cheekily told me during the weekend???
I was upset over something that he should not have said...esp. in the tone I don't like... and how
he makes up for the mistake! His apology begins, "See, I didn't mean to be rude. Now don't expect me to say 'Sorry'. As I begin to grin, he adds, "Next time I do something wrong, say something you don't like - You make me read your blog. Okay? Fine??"
I find myself rolling with laughter that my dearmost sounds as if having to read my blog is a Punishment! Wonder if he really meant it... ;-)
* He is excused temporarily (until my next post), even if he did mean it. :-))))))))))))))))))
I was upset over something that he should not have said...esp. in the tone I don't like... and how
he makes up for the mistake! His apology begins, "See, I didn't mean to be rude. Now don't expect me to say 'Sorry'. As I begin to grin, he adds, "Next time I do something wrong, say something you don't like - You make me read your blog. Okay? Fine??"
I find myself rolling with laughter that my dearmost sounds as if having to read my blog is a Punishment! Wonder if he really meant it... ;-)
* He is excused temporarily (until my next post), even if he did mean it. :-))))))))))))))))))
Once a Mom - Always a Mom
I read this somewhere long ago - "Once a Mother, always a Mother". That time, I was not even married and had just witnessed my sisters struggle with their kids...one after another.
Being a mom myself now, I agree with this statement whole-heartedly and infact, find some solace in the same too. Life is a Roller-coaster ride once the baby comes along, and there is no turning back from that point.
The kids are faster than the parents - in all generations! Somethings, like starting a bike that I didn't do until I was in high school, my 3 year old is already doing so as his RIGHT. (Even though under my watchful guidance) :-)
Being a mom myself now, I agree with this statement whole-heartedly and infact, find some solace in the same too. Life is a Roller-coaster ride once the baby comes along, and there is no turning back from that point.
The kids are faster than the parents - in all generations! Somethings, like starting a bike that I didn't do until I was in high school, my 3 year old is already doing so as his RIGHT. (Even though under my watchful guidance) :-)
Monday, June 30, 2008
Girls and the Right Time to Marry
The other day just heard some guys talking in the lift. One of them was complaining against the girls, who choose to marry late these days. It was nice to hear the 'other side' for a change. We, some married and some not yet tied ones are constantly discussing the topic - especially when any wedding is round the corner. :-)
Here's the chat between the two guys and my 'wish I had said that' included:
*Arguments may be specific to IT Clan.
Guy A: These days, its becoming V bad yaar. Most of the girls are wanting to marry only after they work for 3 years after their Engineering etc.
Guy B: Yes yaar. These girls tell their parents also not to look for an alliance before that. They want to earn lot of money, before they get married.
My Head: Yeah, its true. Most of them want to be self-reliant before being tied down. Who knows what future brings? One way, its good...but then, how good is late marriage?...
Guy A: Money. Thats what rules even girls minds these days. They don't want to marry until they have some back-up.
Guy B: By the time they agree to marry, parents have some tough time searching for a good groom.
My Head: Yeah, right. But for that matter, aren't the Guys willing to work hard and save up as much as possible, before taking up the family responsibilites? Why are the girls being blamed for this attitude? But again, who is at a loss??
At this point, the lift reached my floor and I wished, I could go until the Guy's floor to know their Conclusions - about the Working Girls and the right marriage time...
My Head: Hmm...its good to get married while you are younger, before your minds become more stubborn (as in, I am correct everytime!). Marriage calls for adjustments, in many ways...once you are older and equally capable of money-making, do you wish to settle down for something lesser than desired? How would you survive the rigmarole of having to deal with a Guy's ego, even if he is a loved one?...
Only My Head: How much willing would a girl be to making adjustments for harmony? With both ego's soaring high...where would the satisfaction of a happy relationship exist? For whose sake eventually would a girl marry?....All this and much more leads me to another controversial topic - why is it so important that a Girl marries???....
Here's the chat between the two guys and my 'wish I had said that' included:
*Arguments may be specific to IT Clan.
Guy A: These days, its becoming V bad yaar. Most of the girls are wanting to marry only after they work for 3 years after their Engineering etc.
Guy B: Yes yaar. These girls tell their parents also not to look for an alliance before that. They want to earn lot of money, before they get married.
My Head: Yeah, its true. Most of them want to be self-reliant before being tied down. Who knows what future brings? One way, its good...but then, how good is late marriage?...
Guy A: Money. Thats what rules even girls minds these days. They don't want to marry until they have some back-up.
Guy B: By the time they agree to marry, parents have some tough time searching for a good groom.
My Head: Yeah, right. But for that matter, aren't the Guys willing to work hard and save up as much as possible, before taking up the family responsibilites? Why are the girls being blamed for this attitude? But again, who is at a loss??
At this point, the lift reached my floor and I wished, I could go until the Guy's floor to know their Conclusions - about the Working Girls and the right marriage time...
My Head: Hmm...its good to get married while you are younger, before your minds become more stubborn (as in, I am correct everytime!). Marriage calls for adjustments, in many ways...once you are older and equally capable of money-making, do you wish to settle down for something lesser than desired? How would you survive the rigmarole of having to deal with a Guy's ego, even if he is a loved one?...
Only My Head: How much willing would a girl be to making adjustments for harmony? With both ego's soaring high...where would the satisfaction of a happy relationship exist? For whose sake eventually would a girl marry?....All this and much more leads me to another controversial topic - why is it so important that a Girl marries???....
Monday, June 23, 2008
Latest Haikus
---25april08
Ek aur subha aayi,
kuch yaad aa raha...
kuch jaisay bhool gayi.
---28April08
Mixed emotions overflowing in my mind...
nowhere related to happiness of any kind...
Sometimes force myself to think and decide,
whether to feel or jus let feelings slide!
Ek aur subha aayi,
kuch yaad aa raha...
kuch jaisay bhool gayi.
---28April08
Mixed emotions overflowing in my mind...
nowhere related to happiness of any kind...
Sometimes force myself to think and decide,
whether to feel or jus let feelings slide!
Young one is now 3!
---My son is becoming more of a thinker these days. Few days ago, while we played "Acting Acting"..... he analysed our mutual angry reactions!! In his words, "Mumma gettin angry, then mumma telling know - I will leave you here and go". "Sahil gettin angry, then Sahil telling know - Sahil not your friend". "Papa gettin angry, then papa telling know - I will not talk to you." Everything was fine, until I suddenly realised; I have never told him, I will fetch him back from where I say I will leave him!! I made sure, next time, we were out and I got an oppotunity (that came with ease!) to tell sahil, I will leave you here and go - I concluded with, then, I will come with papa later and take you home. :-) My son, happily chirps, "okay mumma, leave me now. Come with papa, okay?"
---While climbing stairs, I am sudenly pulled away from the next step, by a little hand gripping my dress - "Mumma, its red. stop!". The "Red Light, Green Light" play as I climb stairs at the end of a tiresome day - makes me wonder at the innocence of his childhood.
---Sahil says, "Sahil not can do" for something he 'can not do'. I wonder which is a better way to correct him - "Sahil can not do" or better still - "Sahil can do". :-))
---My son has learnt a valuable lesson in Bike Riding. I just wish, it doesn't fly away like all other small things. He says, 'if we going fast know, we fall down know, we ghet hurt know; then, we cry - mumma mumma'.
---Two days back, he showered me with his love. Guess, what he called me - "Kutty mumma".
:-)) (He lovingly calls his doll as kutty baby)
---The doll they gave on his first day of school has become 'Sahil's baby'. He relates to her as -- "Mumma, sahil not eating, mumma scolding know. Sahil telling baby, baby not eating - Sahil scolding then." :-)) Thank God, my scoldings that seem to work sometimes (when he is playfully ignoring food) are being taken in the right sense.
---On me trying to cut the nails of my cousins recently-born baby, my son tries to act like a grown-up. He says to the baby, "Mumma cut sahil's nails know, sahil not cry. Sahil show fingers pOperly. Baby moving know, then, mumma cut finger know!" :-)
---5June08 - First day of his LKG. The parents of the fidgety new-schoolgoers were more impatient I felt. For many more 'waiting to see them settled' parents like me, it was a big day. Watching other children make crying mess and their parents make fuss - my sahil too started making some crying-like noise - albeit sans tears! :-) Wasn't I a proud mumma!
---4June08 - First time my son asks me a question in malayalam - 'pooaam pettin
illya?" (Not able to go?). Where? At a signal!
---While climbing stairs, I am sudenly pulled away from the next step, by a little hand gripping my dress - "Mumma, its red. stop!". The "Red Light, Green Light" play as I climb stairs at the end of a tiresome day - makes me wonder at the innocence of his childhood.
---Sahil says, "Sahil not can do" for something he 'can not do'. I wonder which is a better way to correct him - "Sahil can not do" or better still - "Sahil can do". :-))
---My son has learnt a valuable lesson in Bike Riding. I just wish, it doesn't fly away like all other small things. He says, 'if we going fast know, we fall down know, we ghet hurt know; then, we cry - mumma mumma'.
---Two days back, he showered me with his love. Guess, what he called me - "Kutty mumma".
:-)) (He lovingly calls his doll as kutty baby)
---The doll they gave on his first day of school has become 'Sahil's baby'. He relates to her as -- "Mumma, sahil not eating, mumma scolding know. Sahil telling baby, baby not eating - Sahil scolding then." :-)) Thank God, my scoldings that seem to work sometimes (when he is playfully ignoring food) are being taken in the right sense.
---On me trying to cut the nails of my cousins recently-born baby, my son tries to act like a grown-up. He says to the baby, "Mumma cut sahil's nails know, sahil not cry. Sahil show fingers pOperly. Baby moving know, then, mumma cut finger know!" :-)
---5June08 - First day of his LKG. The parents of the fidgety new-schoolgoers were more impatient I felt. For many more 'waiting to see them settled' parents like me, it was a big day. Watching other children make crying mess and their parents make fuss - my sahil too started making some crying-like noise - albeit sans tears! :-) Wasn't I a proud mumma!
---4June08 - First time my son asks me a question in malayalam - 'pooaam pettin
illya?" (Not able to go?). Where? At a signal!
More than being Just Me...
Have been thinking about sponsoring a child since my son's birthday. Last year's birthday actually. Looks like I have finally found a purpose. I know I want to do something for other little ones - more so, as my little one is growing everyday. :-) Besides the routine money-making tasks, I am now getting a clearer vision about what I really want to do. Hold on...will share more as I get the ball rolling for this...
On the First Anniversary of my Blog
Its One Year this June - since I hesitatingly started Blogging... and am sad to note, I haven't reached anywhere so far. Was tempted to read some tips on the so-called 'Successful Blogging' recently. Read and realized, I need to work on my Blog... need to have a Goal. Goal? For blogging?? Yeah, to make it 'effective' in the least sense. :-(
So, what's the goal of my blog? Well, I need to search for it - its there somewhere - deep in my mind. :-) Basically, I just needed some place to just let my thoughts run ... and I pen them down, as that happens. But, in that quest itself - I seem to have failed. I haven't dedicated time to do just that - ! I put down somethings, now and then (esp. about my son). I think of putting down many more thoughts - and just miss doing so.
* - The last para starts and ends with 'so'. :-)
** Let me think - will get back with something good - about the Goal.
So, what's the goal of my blog? Well, I need to search for it - its there somewhere - deep in my mind. :-) Basically, I just needed some place to just let my thoughts run ... and I pen them down, as that happens. But, in that quest itself - I seem to have failed. I haven't dedicated time to do just that - ! I put down somethings, now and then (esp. about my son). I think of putting down many more thoughts - and just miss doing so.
* - The last para starts and ends with 'so'. :-)
** Let me think - will get back with something good - about the Goal.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Tagged Myself and You...
Was tempted to do this tag and took this tag from Temu's Blog:
1. Last movie you saw in a theater?
Kaal - Hindi (Watched when I was carrying my son, and I wondered WHY did I?)
2. What book are you reading?
None presently. Browse, parenting sites and blogs when bored.
3. Favorite board game?
Carrom Board (with anyone) and enjoy Scrabble (with my hubby).
4. Favorite magazine?
Reader’s Digest.
5. Favorite smells?
Cigar\Brut\Johnson's Baby Powder.
6. Favorite sounds?
The sound of the waves, thunder, laughter of my kiddo and heartbeats.
7. Worst feeling in the world?
To lose a parent.
8. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up?
What is to be Cooked and In how much Time. :-)
9. Favorite fast food place?
Everywhere is crowded. :-(
10. Future child’s name?
Soni (if at all).
11. Finish this statement. “If I had lot of money I’d ….?”
I would spend a considerable amount on going for family vacations, buy gifts for loved ones wihtout second thoughts.
12. Do you drive fast?
I ride fast, when possible. :-)
13. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?
No. I sleep with 2 human-like teddy bears.
14. Storms - cool or scary?
Coooool.
15. What was your first car?
Esteem.
16. Favorite drink?
Appy Fizz.
17. Finish this statement, “If I had the time I would …”?
Learn Sketching and other Creative Things like Glass Painting.
18. Do you eat the stems on broccoli?
Yes. My grandma even used to marinate it and deep fry. :-) Tastes good.
19. If you could dye your hair any color, what would be your choice?
Brown.
20. Name all the different cities/towns you’ve lived in?
Amritsar, Gurgaon, Kota, Chennai and Kerala.
21. Favorite sports to watch?
Hockey. Ice Hockey too. Figure Skating.
22. One nice thing about the person who sent this to you?
Temu is a soft person at heart but typically like a coconut - covered with a tough exterior. Very Practical. Temu - correct me if I am wrong ;)
23. What’s under your bed?
Nothing.
24. Would you like to be born as yourself again?
Why not?
25. Morning person, or night owl?
Depends, can be both. However, can work better early hours.
26. Over easy, or sunny side up?
Mix of both.
27. Favorite place to relax?
Open spaces - terrace, garden, beach (when not crowded).
28. Favorite pie?
Chocolate.
29. Favorite ice cream flavor?
Chocolate. Actually can have any, except Strawberrrrryyyyy.
*BTW I tag You.*
The Overactive Traffic Policeman!
On my way to my son's creche, every morning, I see a traffic policeman, who guides the traffic and people with such energy thats SURPRISING! Really, that guy would make you think and re-look at him, searching for some signs of madness or drinking problem...
The first day I saw him, I thought he was trying to create an impression over some Minister's convoy that may be due to pass that way. I was proved wrong...Then, for few days, I could not help but get amused at his energetic antics, for the routine job that he needs to do. Last few days, I have humbled. :-) I am now neither surprised nor amused at the way he conducts traffic. I have moved on to the 'Inspiring' feeling that comes from watching him perform and out-perform himself.
Day-after-day, in the sweltering heat also, he behaves as if the heat or the boredom of his task has no effect on him. With the same 'HIGH-ENERGY' he signals stop to one side, signals to come to another side and like a superman turns around and signals the third direction. I may video shoot him to add authenticity to this write-up. :-) Its worth watching...
I have started thinking, why does he do all this? To keep himself happy? To attract public attention? To bring a few smiles around, at his expense? None of these reasons seem to fit the puzzle he creates. I am still searching for the 'sahi jawaab' ...
*Note: Hope hubby doesn't notice my admiration for the over-active policeman! ;-) Good that he hardly takes time out to read my blog. :-))))))))))))))
The first day I saw him, I thought he was trying to create an impression over some Minister's convoy that may be due to pass that way. I was proved wrong...Then, for few days, I could not help but get amused at his energetic antics, for the routine job that he needs to do. Last few days, I have humbled. :-) I am now neither surprised nor amused at the way he conducts traffic. I have moved on to the 'Inspiring' feeling that comes from watching him perform and out-perform himself.
Day-after-day, in the sweltering heat also, he behaves as if the heat or the boredom of his task has no effect on him. With the same 'HIGH-ENERGY' he signals stop to one side, signals to come to another side and like a superman turns around and signals the third direction. I may video shoot him to add authenticity to this write-up. :-) Its worth watching...
I have started thinking, why does he do all this? To keep himself happy? To attract public attention? To bring a few smiles around, at his expense? None of these reasons seem to fit the puzzle he creates. I am still searching for the 'sahi jawaab' ...
*Note: Hope hubby doesn't notice my admiration for the over-active policeman! ;-) Good that he hardly takes time out to read my blog. :-))))))))))))))
Monday, May 26, 2008
2 Weeks Before Turning 3...
The Littul ons' Bday is due in 2 weeks...he already seems Big for his age. What's he been doing off late???
--- The other day when Hubby could not start our car, as the battery had got little old and cold...I had the honour of dropping my son to his Pre-Kg class on my bike. While I was hurrying to get my keys and other stuff; my little fellow searched through his pile of toys (broken mostly) for his toy car and pulled-out the batteries with much Joy! He went running to his dad with his Eureka! and says, "Papa, look, Sahil got battery. Now, we go in car?" His dad had to explain to him that his toy car only can run with those batteries...
--- He somehow feels everything that glows is because of "battery". As we go together on my bike, and he finds that the signals are not working...he asks me, "Mumma, signal not working, battery finished?"
--- I had scolded him a few days ago for running out the main gate at his creche, while I was fetching his bag. Yesterday, as we walk hand-in-hand out of the same gate, he questions me: "Mumma, why you left gate open? Sahil run out know, then? You scold me know." He was reasoning with me that its my fault if I leave the gate opened and tempt him to go beyond the safe zone! How apt. :-)
---Yesterday, being a holiday, I was pampering him since he woke up. As I refused to give in to his demand for 'chips', he tells me, "Mumma, now don't make cry, okay?" I laughed until I could digest that he is subtly using emotional blackmail already!
--- The other day when Hubby could not start our car, as the battery had got little old and cold...I had the honour of dropping my son to his Pre-Kg class on my bike. While I was hurrying to get my keys and other stuff; my little fellow searched through his pile of toys (broken mostly) for his toy car and pulled-out the batteries with much Joy! He went running to his dad with his Eureka! and says, "Papa, look, Sahil got battery. Now, we go in car?" His dad had to explain to him that his toy car only can run with those batteries...
--- He somehow feels everything that glows is because of "battery". As we go together on my bike, and he finds that the signals are not working...he asks me, "Mumma, signal not working, battery finished?"
--- I had scolded him a few days ago for running out the main gate at his creche, while I was fetching his bag. Yesterday, as we walk hand-in-hand out of the same gate, he questions me: "Mumma, why you left gate open? Sahil run out know, then? You scold me know." He was reasoning with me that its my fault if I leave the gate opened and tempt him to go beyond the safe zone! How apt. :-)
---Yesterday, being a holiday, I was pampering him since he woke up. As I refused to give in to his demand for 'chips', he tells me, "Mumma, now don't make cry, okay?" I laughed until I could digest that he is subtly using emotional blackmail already!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Mothers' Day and Me!
It brings a smile as I count my blessings. My little 'almost-3-year-old' son went shopping with his dad to get a 'ghiffth' for his 'mumma'. Wished me 'Appy Muther's Day - Mumma' with a naughty smile as he handed me a lovely card. The card - of course - courtesy my hubby was a touchy one - signed as 'Saku' - jus as my son likes to be called these days.
Being unprepared for the surprise, it meant much much more. They wrapped up a lovely 'mum holding son' show-piece for me! Being the kid he is, saku was more impatient that me and could hardly hold on, until I opened the wrapping, unveiling the gift. Best was yet to come.... as my eyes filled up with motherly warmth, Saku announces that the lady is 'mumma' and the baby is 'saku'. I jus wished, even though it was a present for 'Muther's Day'... somewhere a special place must have been for the father who guided my little one - to make it so special for me.
Anyway... am sure, he now knows, we (my son and I) must be upto something when his day approaches! Wait for Father's Day man!!!
*Note: Will put up a pic of the 'ghiffth' here!
Being unprepared for the surprise, it meant much much more. They wrapped up a lovely 'mum holding son' show-piece for me! Being the kid he is, saku was more impatient that me and could hardly hold on, until I opened the wrapping, unveiling the gift. Best was yet to come.... as my eyes filled up with motherly warmth, Saku announces that the lady is 'mumma' and the baby is 'saku'. I jus wished, even though it was a present for 'Muther's Day'... somewhere a special place must have been for the father who guided my little one - to make it so special for me.
Anyway... am sure, he now knows, we (my son and I) must be upto something when his day approaches! Wait for Father's Day man!!!
*Note: Will put up a pic of the 'ghiffth' here!
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Ups and Downs
Clock Ticking away
my mind is in a sway...
Do I just go away?
**********************
Pending tasks to be done
Tasks many but me just one!
Can do them only - one by one...
*********************
Freedom
Personal Space
Choices - do I have any?
**********************
Rough weather
Bloom or Wither?
Soar or Surrender?
**********************
The will to stand for myself
against all odds, whatsoever.
No more, no less.
***********************
One good thing.
I hear my murmur...
calling out to the forgotten God!
*************************************
my mind is in a sway...
Do I just go away?
**********************
Pending tasks to be done
Tasks many but me just one!
Can do them only - one by one...
*********************
Freedom
Personal Space
Choices - do I have any?
**********************
Rough weather
Bloom or Wither?
Soar or Surrender?
**********************
The will to stand for myself
against all odds, whatsoever.
No more, no less.
***********************
One good thing.
I hear my murmur...
calling out to the forgotten God!
*************************************
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Things a Mom tends to think...
1. When you look at a healthier looking kid of the same age, - "This kid must be older than mine!".
2. When you see colouring, drawing or block items - you are reminded of the time\effort you spend picking all that stuff from your floor (simultaneously trying to make your toddler join u in that task)!
3. When you see kids crossing the roads without looking even once - "I will ensure my kid watches his step!"
2. When you see colouring, drawing or block items - you are reminded of the time\effort you spend picking all that stuff from your floor (simultaneously trying to make your toddler join u in that task)!
3. When you see kids crossing the roads without looking even once - "I will ensure my kid watches his step!"
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Little Things of Little Fellow
A friend was askin me today, when I update her with so many funny things my son does....why don't I add the same descriptions to my blog? So here go some of them...
31-Mar-08
---My mum fell down and Sahil in all his innocence comes running to me and says, "Naani fell down - Nicely". He is yet to understand Adjectives and their proper use!
26-Mar-08
--Sahil threw a ball out of the balcony. While returning home, after picking it up from two floors down, as his dad scolds him for having thrown it, the explanation comes pat: "Papa carrying Sahil know, Sahil throw ball because". Blaming the dad for having carried him up while he held the ball! How will we be rated as he grows?...
17-Mar-08
-- My son is very helpful. He brings the utensils back into the kitchen from the dining room, after dinner. While I am still busy in the kitchen, he smiles at me and waits for a minute for me to acknowledge his help with my "Thank you". While going out, he quietly switches the light off, with a naughty grin he mumbles "U r wellllcummm". I stand to wonder, why does he help me!
29-Feb-08
---Looking with lot of interest into the vessel containing 'Dal', Saku stared at the long, slit green chillies laying at the bottom of the vessel. Chillies were partly covered with Dal and guess what my son compares it to; after minutes of acute observation? "Cocodile"! (Crocodile) :-)
25-Feb-08
---My son got a Bat-Ball set from his creche after the "Race" the children had among themselves. I was told that my dear fellow was least bothered with all the 'hustle-bustle' of the 'race' and he cooly walked watching everyone (moving his head side-to-side) till the touch line, kept the small stone on the line and walked back! Obviously he came last. His version of the race? "Mummmaa, everyone runninh, Sahi alcho runninh, sahi touchin, keepi, walkin, comin back. Mumma, everyone laughin. Aarti Maam gave bat-ball".
---At Family Day recently, he gave a little girl his Orange Balloon and when the girl was happily playing with it all alone (ignoring my son), he tried pulling it back from her! She gave him one nice Push. Guess how he complains about it to amma (his Grandma) - "ammama, sahi gave my orange balloo to bad girl. Bad girl pushin sahi. Sahi fell down ammama. Thenn...ammamaa...sahi tell mumma, bad girl takin sahi balloo". We had to remind him to tell his grandma that he was pushed because he tried taking back what he had generously given!
21-Feb-08
---The other day my hubby was scolding Sahil and we were caught unawares with him showing his palm towards his dad and mumbling "Thupidh fellow" (Stupid fellow)!! Probably, he learnt it from one of the tired teachers at his Pre-school. I was both shocked and amused. :-)
---Sahil and his maamu (my bro) always get into an argument whether what Sahil is wearing is "Knicker" or "Pyjama"...my little fellow announces angrily each time - "Jamada (where did he learn that for Pyjama!!) nahin hai - niker hai". Sahil wins!
---Last night (20Feb08), hubby was trying to record an inspiring alarm for himself. Sahil came up with one, after seeing my hubby's trials. He said, "Papa, wake up, Coloring waiting U". :-)) This was purely his thought (as I was suggesting to hubby to record something about what U want to do when u wake up)...Probably, Sahil thinks Coloring is so important!
---One day when I thought I would give the good news to my son that I have made his "one time favourite" - 'idli'....I told him, "Saku, mumma nay aaj idllliiii banayi hai". He quietly turned towards me and asked me, "poori banayi nai?", making all my effort seem waste!
*This section would be regularly updated. :-)
My Attempts at Haiku\Short Poems ---- A Collection
12Oct07
Typing and Erasing...
Wondering....
Whats Worth Saving?
**************************************
10June07
Reminiscence.
Dreams of Yore
Again Lure!
**************************************
16May07
In heavy storm
Typing and Erasing...
Wondering....
Whats Worth Saving?
**************************************
10June07
Reminiscence.
Dreams of Yore
Again Lure!
**************************************
16May07
In heavy storm
engulfed mercilessly,
Chillness beckons me...
**************************************
15May07
Swans in pond
15May07
Swans in pond
Rufflin beneath water
in tranquility?..
**************************************
30Dec04
Another new day,
mind racing in several ways...
joy exists, an it fakes!
30Dec04
Another new day,
mind racing in several ways...
joy exists, an it fakes!
**************************************
04June04
Just yesterday, I wrote a few words
about the recent loss...
could not continue for long.
Just yesterday, I wrote a few words
about the recent loss...
could not continue for long.
**************************************
21May04
21May04
Colorful fiery imagery
suggests thundering rumble,
in wonder, I just fumble.
**************************************
20May04
Flowers and buds together
bloomed as well as closed tight...
shades of yellow bright.
**************************************
19May04
Glittering Brilliance
Flower blooms with another within...
The life goes on.
**************************************
18May04
All I am to see
is a pictureless cross sign,
I smile and I sigh!
**************************************
17May04
Deep orangish sunset
Initiates fresh morrow hope
At end of today...
**************************************
14May04
Shallow waters an Swan
feelings to let go n go on...
am retunin where i belong!
**************************************
11May04
Water gushing on
coming towards me in swing...
just like life's insecurities!
**************************************
07May04
awe inspiring me...
Thot captivating sight,
Thot captivating sight,
symbolizes thee!
**************************************
06May 04
Its one week today...
an' I am weeping within
Feel left out as it is...
06May 04
Its one week today...
an' I am weeping within
Feel left out as it is...
**************************************
05May04
Take time to sigh
Breathe deeply when u smile...
Breath doesnt last.
**************************************
14Aug2000
What I saw yesterday?
a hazy moon,
shying away.
***
The distance seems too much:
The distance seems too much:
when you are alone,
or totally non-observant.
***
The sky seemingly tranquil,
The sky seemingly tranquil,
Stars shine brightly.
Sea hides behind clouds,
I hug the moment tightly.
***
I wonder at the sense of mankind.
I wonder at the sense of mankind.
Dog exhibits the same.
Digging the earth to hide his bone.
***
Clothes on the hangers
Clothes on the hangers
waiting to be worn,
Children walking naked in their want.
***
The joyous sea rushes
to meet me.
I jump in, leaving myself free!
***
Dusky brown-squirrel,
Dusky brown-squirrel,
holding the nut,
her tiny palms.
***
A troublesome night.
A troublesome night.
Stillness in the sky.
I heard my mind cry,
in want of that stillness within.
***
A serene surrounding.
A serene surrounding.
A calm sea, a few tress.
My imagination and I.
***
My cat staring pitifully at me.
My cat staring pitifully at me.
With moist eyes,
beside her kitten's dead body.
***
A comfortable bench at the bus-stop.
A drunken man sleeping beneath.
Adjusting uncomfortably.
***
The smoothness of the kitten's fur.
The smoothness of the kitten's fur.
The heart-rending mewing
piques my soul to bring home,
the alive new-born from the dustbin.
***
A beautiful sparrow, injuring her beak.
Hitting it on the iron bars...
longing for the sky.
***
A hermit in deep meditation
closing eyes to the transient world
Praying for Moksha.
***
I am happy.
I am happy.
I am not fortunate.
I chose to leave sorrow behind.
***
Why do we offer goodies to God?
Why do we offer goodies to God?
We share our joys.
Hoping He'll share sorrows too!
*******************************************
16Aug2000
16Aug2000
Pale-cream moon in the sky
Partly hidden by the leaves
Partly visible to the eye!
***
Deep orange scattering in the heaven.
So much calmness in his vast abode.
Why Turbulence in my small mind?
***
Longing heartily for something.
Reaching out to secure it.
Slips farther with my touch.
***
On a weary moonless night,
to quench my thirst for moon;
stars twinkle consolingly.
***
Relief for an old body
a comfortable non-screeching bed,
a noiseless walking stick,
a non-grumbling helping hand.
****************************************
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Vagaries of Life
When the strong wind blows,
Dry leaves often quiver,
but the tree trunks hold
onto their roots and the ground
below, with all determination.
Our life is no different.
When the whirlwind of
sorrow surrounds us,
this is the time to test
whether we are to be withering leaves
Or we are the tree trunks
Holding onto our support,
ready to withstand
any lash from time.
Some or the other day
Our fall is due,
but why give in to the
minor waves of difficulty?
It is sure to pass off
As nothing has the power to,
stay fixed at one point
for a very long time.
Does happiness stay forever?
Definitely not.
Then why think that sorrow
is the end?
What about beyond?
Even in the vast ocean
Carrying abundant lives,
Ocean currents rise,
Tidal waves occur.
The Earth, which beholds
the entire life,
All the surviving beings;
suffers from Earthquakes,
bears volcanic Eruptions,
sees forest Fires and
is often hit by meteors.
Is it very calm in space?
Definitely not.
The whole cosmic is in motion
continuing a regular pattern
and still something unusual
keeps coming up.
The leaves do not fall only
because of the wind’s strength,
they wither because they feel
they are dry and weak;
Disheartened, don’t even try to
protect their own fall.
Whereas the tree trunks
feel themselves powerful,
wholeheartedly try to gain
the strength from Earth’s depth.
It is not that
the tree trunks don’t get uprooted,
they too meet the
fate of a leaf some day;
but what makes them superior
Is that, they fall after a struggle.
Joys, Sorrows, Tears, Laughter...
these are the Vagaries of life,
Hope is to be their constant partner
During the Tests of time.
Dry leaves often quiver,
but the tree trunks hold
onto their roots and the ground
below, with all determination.
Our life is no different.
When the whirlwind of
sorrow surrounds us,
this is the time to test
whether we are to be withering leaves
Or we are the tree trunks
Holding onto our support,
ready to withstand
any lash from time.
Some or the other day
Our fall is due,
but why give in to the
minor waves of difficulty?
It is sure to pass off
As nothing has the power to,
stay fixed at one point
for a very long time.
Does happiness stay forever?
Definitely not.
Then why think that sorrow
is the end?
What about beyond?
Even in the vast ocean
Carrying abundant lives,
Ocean currents rise,
Tidal waves occur.
The Earth, which beholds
the entire life,
All the surviving beings;
suffers from Earthquakes,
bears volcanic Eruptions,
sees forest Fires and
is often hit by meteors.
Is it very calm in space?
Definitely not.
The whole cosmic is in motion
continuing a regular pattern
and still something unusual
keeps coming up.
The leaves do not fall only
because of the wind’s strength,
they wither because they feel
they are dry and weak;
Disheartened, don’t even try to
protect their own fall.
Whereas the tree trunks
feel themselves powerful,
wholeheartedly try to gain
the strength from Earth’s depth.
It is not that
the tree trunks don’t get uprooted,
they too meet the
fate of a leaf some day;
but what makes them superior
Is that, they fall after a struggle.
Joys, Sorrows, Tears, Laughter...
these are the Vagaries of life,
Hope is to be their constant partner
During the Tests of time.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Nice Links
Cuppy Cake
<http://audio.isg.si/audiox/?q=node/404>
The House of Hindi Poetry
<http://www.archiecomics.com/pops_shop/dailycomics/dailycomic.html>
Women - Articles
<http://www.meditationsforwomen.com/articles/>
100 Best of the Best Poems
<http://100-poems.com/poems/best/>
Chicken Soup for the Soul
<http://www.beliefnet.com/features/chickensoup.html>
Nice Poem for the Lost yet Loved Father
<http://100-poems.com/poems/best/0319006.htm>
<http://audio.isg.si/audiox/?q=node/404>
The House of Hindi Poetry
<http://manaskriti.com/kaavyaalaya/>
Archies<http://www.archiecomics.com/pops_shop/dailycomics/dailycomic.html>
Women - Articles
<http://www.meditationsforwomen.com/articles/>
100 Best of the Best Poems
<http://100-poems.com/poems/best/>
Chicken Soup for the Soul
<http://www.beliefnet.com/features/chickensoup.html>
Nice Poem for the Lost yet Loved Father
<http://100-poems.com/poems/best/0319006.htm>
Friday, September 14, 2007
Pebbles
The other day, I was wondering,
if life is what it seems;
over-powering and clairvoyant
yet, enveloped in dreams!
Fine sand slips through
within my toes, at the shore,
Life's givin its best,
why then, asking for more?
As some pebbles slide below
the sole of my feet,
Inspired by the depth of Ocean,
clarity and dreams meet!
if life is what it seems;
over-powering and clairvoyant
yet, enveloped in dreams!
Fine sand slips through
within my toes, at the shore,
Life's givin its best,
why then, asking for more?
As some pebbles slide below
the sole of my feet,
Inspired by the depth of Ocean,
clarity and dreams meet!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Hold My Hand
Came across this beautiful piece....long ago. And everytime I read it, it feels nice...
Little girl and her father were crossing a bridge. The father was kind of scared, so he asked his little daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my hand so that you don't fall into the river." The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my hand." "What's the difference?" Asked the puzzled father. "There's a big difference," replied the little girl. "If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never let my hand go."
Little girl and her father were crossing a bridge. The father was kind of scared, so he asked his little daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my hand so that you don't fall into the river." The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my hand." "What's the difference?" Asked the puzzled father. "There's a big difference," replied the little girl. "If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never let my hand go."
Thursday, June 28, 2007
On Our New Home
New Dreams taking shape
on the grounds of sand,
mud would be strong walls
with the swish of a wand.....
So much of thought goes in,
so many hopes entangle the mind,
somewhere theres fear too...
yet, the will to own my ground!
Tomorrow may rain or shine,
Roar thunder or lightning strike...
Today, now, am busy moulding a shelter
for me and mine....
With a song in my heart
I beckon the promises
the thought of home brings along
engulfed in togetherness....
Mud would be raised
from dust to a home...
would it be my haven
when I am in dust form?
on the grounds of sand,
mud would be strong walls
with the swish of a wand.....
So much of thought goes in,
so many hopes entangle the mind,
somewhere theres fear too...
yet, the will to own my ground!
Tomorrow may rain or shine,
Roar thunder or lightning strike...
Today, now, am busy moulding a shelter
for me and mine....
With a song in my heart
I beckon the promises
the thought of home brings along
engulfed in togetherness....
Mud would be raised
from dust to a home...
would it be my haven
when I am in dust form?
Monday, June 18, 2007
Thots on a Rainy Day
Precious time slips away
Without saying, what must be said...
Emotions topple as if in stampede
During the rigmarole of earning bread...
Watched a controversial movie
That struck some thinking chord
Is it so easy to get entangled?
Or so difficult to stay unaffected??
Its by sharing that love grows
Even by over-looking sometimes...
Its by pin-pointing that pain grows
even by staring in silence at times...
What is of greater value,
The love that binds
or the relationship that survives somewhere deep within...
what happens to untouched wounds
over a period of time
if all the time, overlooked?
When is the right time
to make time for bonds?
How long will the bond last
when not looked after?
How does any relation thrive?
Is it enough it exists?
Shudn't it be nurtured with togetherness,
borne with a pride?
Why does the mind go wavering...
In search of something that exists,
when to its existence
we turn a blind eye?
How much happiness one deserves,
who is to decide?
Without saying, what must be said...
Emotions topple as if in stampede
During the rigmarole of earning bread...
Watched a controversial movie
That struck some thinking chord
Is it so easy to get entangled?
Or so difficult to stay unaffected??
Its by sharing that love grows
Even by over-looking sometimes...
Its by pin-pointing that pain grows
even by staring in silence at times...
What is of greater value,
The love that binds
or the relationship that survives somewhere deep within...
what happens to untouched wounds
over a period of time
if all the time, overlooked?
When is the right time
to make time for bonds?
How long will the bond last
when not looked after?
How does any relation thrive?
Is it enough it exists?
Shudn't it be nurtured with togetherness,
borne with a pride?
Why does the mind go wavering...
In search of something that exists,
when to its existence
we turn a blind eye?
How much happiness one deserves,
who is to decide?
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
On Ur 2nd Bday
Joy always to behold my little one!
How long would 'Little' you remain?
becoming your own person
with each passing sun and rain.....
Watching you become - in your gestures
"Big and Strong" - waving that little arm of yours,
leads me to all those memories of your birth
entwined with motherly love and tears!
So many times earlier too
I wished I could pen down
all the feelings I feel
Because of you.....
I begin about you and I
About how deeply I have felt
when I first held you close...
about how sweetly your fingers
have curled around mine several times...
Somewhere down the line
the flow sweeps your dad along
And I stop to wonder
what a bond you two have also formed!
While we watch you run around
uncontrollably sometimes now,
I am bound to recall - how you were
not crawling... but sliding along...on the floor!
Everytime anything new that you speak
fills me with unbound happiness...
And everytime I am overwhelmed,
there's a small prayer that unknowingly
escapes my lips, for you, my dear one!
Would you remember how we have been
How we are taken in by your presence....
when time flies by and you would too,
would our memories work well
when we would have to let you go...
to create your own world, find your own happiness...
Its with love we are bound
my loved one...
why then the fear of loss
that may or may not come at all?
And as if you now remain needing me
as in early stages of your life...
You have grown and our little circle
has enlarged to take in your little steps
even if those lead you little far,
little beyond my arms.....
Theres been so much until now
so much more yet to come.....
as I wish for a happy childhood
for my sweet little son!
It takes my breath away
when with a cheek you refuse
to make me your own...
jus to surprise later
with a lovely hug
totally unasked for!
As you learn to say things,
we strive to teach all we can...
sometimes, its nice to hear you call
Jeshee - in place of dad!
Let me hold on my emotions
for other days...
let me not outpour
all in one go.....
You are and will always remain
My cherished One, our little son!
How long would 'Little' you remain?
becoming your own person
with each passing sun and rain.....
Watching you become - in your gestures
"Big and Strong" - waving that little arm of yours,
leads me to all those memories of your birth
entwined with motherly love and tears!
So many times earlier too
I wished I could pen down
all the feelings I feel
Because of you.....
I begin about you and I
About how deeply I have felt
when I first held you close...
about how sweetly your fingers
have curled around mine several times...
Somewhere down the line
the flow sweeps your dad along
And I stop to wonder
what a bond you two have also formed!
While we watch you run around
uncontrollably sometimes now,
I am bound to recall - how you were
not crawling... but sliding along...on the floor!
Everytime anything new that you speak
fills me with unbound happiness...
And everytime I am overwhelmed,
there's a small prayer that unknowingly
escapes my lips, for you, my dear one!
Would you remember how we have been
How we are taken in by your presence....
when time flies by and you would too,
would our memories work well
when we would have to let you go...
to create your own world, find your own happiness...
Its with love we are bound
my loved one...
why then the fear of loss
that may or may not come at all?
And as if you now remain needing me
as in early stages of your life...
You have grown and our little circle
has enlarged to take in your little steps
even if those lead you little far,
little beyond my arms.....
Theres been so much until now
so much more yet to come.....
as I wish for a happy childhood
for my sweet little son!
It takes my breath away
when with a cheek you refuse
to make me your own...
jus to surprise later
with a lovely hug
totally unasked for!
As you learn to say things,
we strive to teach all we can...
sometimes, its nice to hear you call
Jeshee - in place of dad!
Let me hold on my emotions
for other days...
let me not outpour
all in one go.....
You are and will always remain
My cherished One, our little son!
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Music - On the Road
It surprises me to see, how easily people adopt new ways - sometimes even without analyzing where its leading them! For instance, the "supposed relaxation" that one achieves while listening to music - irrespective of doing so at a risk.
I wonder at the decision making ability of such fellow beings. Being on the move and being in a different world (by closing their ears and mind to others around them). Don't you think our decisions on the roads (Indian roads atleast) are also based on some of the sounds we hear around us as well? And what do we get by blocking off those sounds?
Its strange... these days, I see people walking on the road busy talking into their mobiles, with a non-bothered attitude even towards the traffic at times! Not jus this, but even people (here, mostly IT clan!) with music flowing into their ears, trying to cross the road, without even bothering to see Left or Right (leave alone looking twice)!
I wish, atleast those who read my blog, would stop and take a look at where we are heading - when we make certain changes to our lifestyle!
I wonder at the decision making ability of such fellow beings. Being on the move and being in a different world (by closing their ears and mind to others around them). Don't you think our decisions on the roads (Indian roads atleast) are also based on some of the sounds we hear around us as well? And what do we get by blocking off those sounds?
Its strange... these days, I see people walking on the road busy talking into their mobiles, with a non-bothered attitude even towards the traffic at times! Not jus this, but even people (here, mostly IT clan!) with music flowing into their ears, trying to cross the road, without even bothering to see Left or Right (leave alone looking twice)!
I wish, atleast those who read my blog, would stop and take a look at where we are heading - when we make certain changes to our lifestyle!
Friday, June 1, 2007
New Arena
New Day, fresh beginning...
Nothin' on the landscape for anyone to see
There's always so much more
than what is visible to the eye!
There is so much to explore.....
startin' then...why with a Sigh?
Where to begin and where to stop...
Leavin' to Mind's eye to decide!!!!!
Nothin' on the landscape for anyone to see
There's always so much more
than what is visible to the eye!
There is so much to explore.....
startin' then...why with a Sigh?
Where to begin and where to stop...
Leavin' to Mind's eye to decide!!!!!
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