Recent Ones:
1. When I picked up my son from school and wanted to surprise him, I told him, "I have made 'Fried Rice' for you today." He surprised me (with his limiting thinking of my cooking talent) by asking me, "Ohhhhhh.... You know to make 'Fried Rice' mumma?" :(
2. The other day I was announcing to my husband that being a North-indian wife, I love to make 'Aloo Parathas' for him and our son. I realized that maybe I was being boastful when I said to my hubby, "Sahil and I love the aloo parathas with curd. Its only you who doesn't like it with curd." Our son was quick to respond, "Mumma, I also am not liking it so much. I am 'managing' what you are making me eat. Really."
I was shocked at the choice of words, the 'managing' and 'not liking'. :( Luckily, my sadness was short-lived as hubby agreed that the food wasn't that bad!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
Legalising Surrogacy
I read through an article the other day about a proposal to legalize Surrogacy. Earlier, I have read posts of my friends; some of who equate surrogacy to a crime, and others who think that the gift of a baby is worth the emotional turbulence.
I find myself incapable of taking a stand in this regard. As a mother, I know the joy and love that holding a baby in the womb brings. That's the reason why I can't imagine the pain a woman would bear, after bearing a baby and then having to give it away. Irrespective of the conditions attached.
Yeah, one may argue, if she is emotionally weak, let her not go in for something like this. This is definitely not the job for the faint-hearted. But, hey, when did 'bearing a kid' become a job? Exactly. It hasn't been too long that the wombs have started to be rented out. For all the emotional hurdles a girl learns to put up with, this might seem the toughest. Worse still, if it is the 'family pressure' that's going to make women rent out their wombs. Why else would anyone, otherwise?
It's very difficult to remove emotional attachments from the issue. Yes, at least for the 'surrogated baby' the woman would be 'truly cared for' during her pregnancy - and 'paid' to have had the courage to spend nine months and more fussing over the baby she would eventually give up. Of course, one woman's loss would be another woman's gain. In that regard, the baby-giving could be compared to a blessing.
In olden days, mothers might have lost their newborns to some or the other health complication, every now and then. Now, when the situation is slightly better, by forcing people to take sufficient care of the mom-to-be and the baby-to-be - we are providing options like 'bringing a life and giving up the same' for a 'price'.
From another perspective, when you lack a bond and you feel the loss - it is natural to search for options. Some may find adoption a better choice (it is, considering the fact that the 'child' is already born and needs a bond too). However, when the facility to 'bear your own' (at the expense of someone else) exists, and one can 'afford' the same, why not? Either way, it is an emotional decision to make. It is easy for anyone to argue this way or that - trying to 'be in the right'; but almost killing for someone standing at that juncture - hoping/wishing/praying.
The other day when I was thinking about this, somehow I was reminded that don't we accept a 'kidney-donor'? Do we look at them (the borrower and the donor) with disgust? Why then, this seems so much more painful? Because, I am a woman too? Because, I know a woman would need to kill herself emotionally before giving away the baby she has mothered? I don't know... [On thinking more about this, I realized, it could be because - we don't feel the kidney growing within us, giving us a sense of fulfillment.)
One thing is for sure. The policy, if it comes into force, would have clauses for:
1. Women's Health
2. Number of Children one can surrogate (legally)
3. Pre-natal and Post-natal care
4. Compensation (minimum legality)
We must not forget any anti-depression treatment that the women may need, not just for a year or two after the deal. The scars may never heal and there could be moments when women would feel the loss, even years after the baby's gone. Ask any old woman how many kids she has had. You will get an answer inclusive of the blue babies who didn't survive long. Such is motherhood.
I find myself incapable of taking a stand in this regard. As a mother, I know the joy and love that holding a baby in the womb brings. That's the reason why I can't imagine the pain a woman would bear, after bearing a baby and then having to give it away. Irrespective of the conditions attached.
Yeah, one may argue, if she is emotionally weak, let her not go in for something like this. This is definitely not the job for the faint-hearted. But, hey, when did 'bearing a kid' become a job? Exactly. It hasn't been too long that the wombs have started to be rented out. For all the emotional hurdles a girl learns to put up with, this might seem the toughest. Worse still, if it is the 'family pressure' that's going to make women rent out their wombs. Why else would anyone, otherwise?
It's very difficult to remove emotional attachments from the issue. Yes, at least for the 'surrogated baby' the woman would be 'truly cared for' during her pregnancy - and 'paid' to have had the courage to spend nine months and more fussing over the baby she would eventually give up. Of course, one woman's loss would be another woman's gain. In that regard, the baby-giving could be compared to a blessing.
In olden days, mothers might have lost their newborns to some or the other health complication, every now and then. Now, when the situation is slightly better, by forcing people to take sufficient care of the mom-to-be and the baby-to-be - we are providing options like 'bringing a life and giving up the same' for a 'price'.
From another perspective, when you lack a bond and you feel the loss - it is natural to search for options. Some may find adoption a better choice (it is, considering the fact that the 'child' is already born and needs a bond too). However, when the facility to 'bear your own' (at the expense of someone else) exists, and one can 'afford' the same, why not? Either way, it is an emotional decision to make. It is easy for anyone to argue this way or that - trying to 'be in the right'; but almost killing for someone standing at that juncture - hoping/wishing/praying.
The other day when I was thinking about this, somehow I was reminded that don't we accept a 'kidney-donor'? Do we look at them (the borrower and the donor) with disgust? Why then, this seems so much more painful? Because, I am a woman too? Because, I know a woman would need to kill herself emotionally before giving away the baby she has mothered? I don't know... [On thinking more about this, I realized, it could be because - we don't feel the kidney growing within us, giving us a sense of fulfillment.)
One thing is for sure. The policy, if it comes into force, would have clauses for:
1. Women's Health
2. Number of Children one can surrogate (legally)
3. Pre-natal and Post-natal care
4. Compensation (minimum legality)
We must not forget any anti-depression treatment that the women may need, not just for a year or two after the deal. The scars may never heal and there could be moments when women would feel the loss, even years after the baby's gone. Ask any old woman how many kids she has had. You will get an answer inclusive of the blue babies who didn't survive long. Such is motherhood.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
The "Elephant" Experience...
Oooooooo! For the first time ever, my son saw a living elephant so closely! I
clicked some snaps...will put them up tomorrow morning first thing. Gotto rush to
cook, didn't want this day to pass off without me noting what fun it was for the
little fellow to see the "Bigggggggg" elephant.
Afterwards, while going on the bike enjoying the cold breeze (yeah, its cold out here in Chennai since its raining now and then since yesterday.); I asked my son how he felt. He says - "Happy. That is opposite of Sad. Like Big is opposite of small." I just joked, "Sahil is small, elephant is Big." He announced, "You are making me sad. I am not small, I did not stand near elephant leg know, so I am not small. Shall we check the height?"
Of course, I had to convince him, even if I stood next to the elephant, elephant
would seem taller/bigger than me! Phew! He was finally 'okay' about being 'small'. :) And to say he is only a five year old... :PPP
clicked some snaps...will put them up tomorrow morning first thing. Gotto rush to
cook, didn't want this day to pass off without me noting what fun it was for the
little fellow to see the "Bigggggggg" elephant.
Afterwards, while going on the bike enjoying the cold breeze (yeah, its cold out here in Chennai since its raining now and then since yesterday.); I asked my son how he felt. He says - "Happy. That is opposite of Sad. Like Big is opposite of small." I just joked, "Sahil is small, elephant is Big." He announced, "You are making me sad. I am not small, I did not stand near elephant leg know, so I am not small. Shall we check the height?"
Of course, I had to convince him, even if I stood next to the elephant, elephant
would seem taller/bigger than me! Phew! He was finally 'okay' about being 'small'. :) And to say he is only a five year old... :PPP
Thursday, June 3, 2010
The Boy Nobody No's
Came across a beautiful poem that makes it crystal clear that even when you love your kids, it is perfectly alright to deny them some things. As parents, we do know what's for the best and still, there are times when we give in to the happy feeling that comes, when we let kids have their way.
This poem has a simple touchy feeling that allows 'forever-agreeing' parents to learn to 'dis-agree' and at the same time, comforts the parents who are forever watchful of their own parenting style, wondering if they are right in saying 'No' to their kids. Let me know what you think.
******
Not so long ago, and not so far away
There was a little boy named Randy.
Now this little boy was a source of true joy,
To his Mom and Dad and family.
But Randy grew up in a curious way,
That some may consider best
For this little boy, unlike most little boys,
Received any and all requests.
He would want to do this, or ask to do that,
And his parents would never say "no";
They loved him so much and really believed
This was the perfect way to grow.
Things seemed to be fine for quite a long time,
And Randy's parents were proud
Then this little boy, who once was a joy,
Threw tantrums in front of a crowd.
His parents would try to quiet him down,
But he would just not be still
He did as he pleased, and no one would dare
To ever cross Randy's will.
They mumbled and stumbled for words to explain
Randy's shockingly rude displays
And all the worst tantrums seemed to be saved
For Christmas and holidays!
But then in the spring, ---- a wonderful thing,
An event , that opened their eyes
It happened in May, on a cool, rainy day
(Sometimes joy can be pain in disguise.)
Randy's friend came to play, and he stayed the whole day,
He and Jim had a wonderful time
When all of a sudden Jim got up to leave,
And started to say his "good byes".
It was getting near night, his friend Jim was polite
But he finally had to say,
"My dad said come home when it starts to get dark
So I'll have to be on my way.”
He left Randy there at the top of the stairs,
Then much to Jim's surprise;
He heard Randy crying, saw a few toys go flying
He just couldn't believe his eyes.
"Oh, let him go home!" Randy screamed all alone,
"I'll be sad and unhappy... who cares!"
Randy didn't know, that his dad was at home,
And heard the whole thing from downstairs.
His dad's heart was grieved, he just couldn't believe
Randy's awful behavior that day
He wanted to talk, so they went for a walk,
And discovered some things on the way.
Randy spoke first, "Jim's dad is the worst,
Who could have a daddy so mean!
I know if I said I wanted to stay,
You'd never make me have to leave!"
His dad then thought back on his own early years,
His father was tender, but tough;
And seemed to be able to balance the two—
Could it be that just love's not enough?
That's when it came clear, who was at fault here,
And Randy was not to blame
As hard as it was to admit to himself
He didn't raise Randy the same.
He turned to his son and regretfully said,
"I've done an injustice to you
By letting you go, never telling you 'no'
But now I see what to do
I was brought up to mind my own dad,
And I knew he loved me so
But there were many times, in love, He had to tell me 'no'!
Now there were tears, but through the years
A bond between us grew;
I'd like to think that someday
You'll say the same of me and you!
I love you so much, but love needs to be tough,
And I should be teaching you how
To handle yourself when faced with a 'no'
Do you think we could start over now?"
Randy thought long on all that was said,
And one thing he did know for sure;
That someday he wanted to be like his dad
He smiled and said, "Yes, Sir".
As they walked home, on that memorable night,
A father and son at their best;
They talked of the lessons of love in a "No",
That you'll never receive in a "Yes".
Copyright © 2004 by Jeannie Veltz
This poem has a simple touchy feeling that allows 'forever-agreeing' parents to learn to 'dis-agree' and at the same time, comforts the parents who are forever watchful of their own parenting style, wondering if they are right in saying 'No' to their kids. Let me know what you think.
******
Not so long ago, and not so far away
There was a little boy named Randy.
Now this little boy was a source of true joy,
To his Mom and Dad and family.
But Randy grew up in a curious way,
That some may consider best
For this little boy, unlike most little boys,
Received any and all requests.
He would want to do this, or ask to do that,
And his parents would never say "no";
They loved him so much and really believed
This was the perfect way to grow.
Things seemed to be fine for quite a long time,
And Randy's parents were proud
Then this little boy, who once was a joy,
Threw tantrums in front of a crowd.
His parents would try to quiet him down,
But he would just not be still
He did as he pleased, and no one would dare
To ever cross Randy's will.
They mumbled and stumbled for words to explain
Randy's shockingly rude displays
And all the worst tantrums seemed to be saved
For Christmas and holidays!
But then in the spring, ---- a wonderful thing,
An event , that opened their eyes
It happened in May, on a cool, rainy day
(Sometimes joy can be pain in disguise.)
Randy's friend came to play, and he stayed the whole day,
He and Jim had a wonderful time
When all of a sudden Jim got up to leave,
And started to say his "good byes".
It was getting near night, his friend Jim was polite
But he finally had to say,
"My dad said come home when it starts to get dark
So I'll have to be on my way.”
He left Randy there at the top of the stairs,
Then much to Jim's surprise;
He heard Randy crying, saw a few toys go flying
He just couldn't believe his eyes.
"Oh, let him go home!" Randy screamed all alone,
"I'll be sad and unhappy... who cares!"
Randy didn't know, that his dad was at home,
And heard the whole thing from downstairs.
His dad's heart was grieved, he just couldn't believe
Randy's awful behavior that day
He wanted to talk, so they went for a walk,
And discovered some things on the way.
Randy spoke first, "Jim's dad is the worst,
Who could have a daddy so mean!
I know if I said I wanted to stay,
You'd never make me have to leave!"
His dad then thought back on his own early years,
His father was tender, but tough;
And seemed to be able to balance the two—
Could it be that just love's not enough?
That's when it came clear, who was at fault here,
And Randy was not to blame
As hard as it was to admit to himself
He didn't raise Randy the same.
He turned to his son and regretfully said,
"I've done an injustice to you
By letting you go, never telling you 'no'
But now I see what to do
I was brought up to mind my own dad,
And I knew he loved me so
But there were many times, in love, He had to tell me 'no'!
Now there were tears, but through the years
A bond between us grew;
I'd like to think that someday
You'll say the same of me and you!
I love you so much, but love needs to be tough,
And I should be teaching you how
To handle yourself when faced with a 'no'
Do you think we could start over now?"
Randy thought long on all that was said,
And one thing he did know for sure;
That someday he wanted to be like his dad
He smiled and said, "Yes, Sir".
As they walked home, on that memorable night,
A father and son at their best;
They talked of the lessons of love in a "No",
That you'll never receive in a "Yes".
Copyright © 2004 by Jeannie Veltz
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
On Amma's B'Day
As another year of our togetherness begins,
Amma, I stand back and look at us;
Wondering at how soon life passes
and we are knit with memorable threads!
Though one fine day you came home
to see me formally,
I know, I had known some things
about you, prior to that.
Your son had given me
an image of you that overflows with love
and still, chooses to let free
those she loves!
At times, when I used to wonder
If you would be able to give me
your love, naturally, the way its given
to all your other children,
including my dear co-sis;
it was comforting to know,
your son had no such doubts.
He was always so sure
of your un-ending compassion,
that he drove away my fears
about complete acceptance,
as soon as they surfaced.
Of course, I still had
my own side of exploration...
From the first time I met you,
and you asked me, how would I like,
to be called.....The feeling I felt then, Amma,
to be asked so caringly,
made me feel one with the family.
Then, there were many other instances too.
Before I could show to you,
that I will do all I can
to keep the happiness and love
in the family intact....
you showered me with genuine affection!!!
If we thought your sons
love you so much b'coz they are yours,
My regards for you unknowingly increased
to see the bonding between bhabhi and you.
I knew it then, somewhere, deep within,
soon, I will be the child of the mother,
my hubby calls his own!
I can't pen down all the treasures
knowing you and being with you
have brought along.....
The one that makes me go emotional
anytime even today,
is the voice of love I heard
when we spoke first after Sahil's birth!
Do you remember, Amma?
You had cried for my pain!
I had fallen in love, all over again,
with my hubby, for him being your son!
That's how you are Amma.
Sweet, Caring, Loving
without hesitating....
gentle in your own way.
I have thought many times
to let you know all this
and much more....
but every time, we are together,
we are busy making new memories!
Only one last thing...
Please teach me, to be the mum
You have been, dear Amma.
Ajj Din Chadheya - Translation
A friend of mine had requested for a translation of the "Ajj Din Chadheya" song from "Love Aaj Kal" movie. I loved to do the translation and thought of adding it here for my other friends. Enjoy!
Love Aaj Kal – (2009)
Music Director: Pritam Chakraborty
Director: Imtiaz Ali
Lyrics: Irshad Kamil
Starring: Saif Ali Khan, Deepika Padukone
Song Title: Ajj Din Chadheya
Tere rang varga ---------- In your color (God is supposed to be very bright, luminescent)
Ajj din chadheya ---------- Today, the day has come out
Tere rang varga ---------- In your color
Phul sa hai khila aaj din ---- the day has blossomed like a flower
Rabba mere din yeh na dhale ----- God, my days do not see a sunset (In the sense, when day ends, my pain doesn’t)
Woh jo mujhe khwab mein mile ---- the one whom meets me in my dreams
Use tu lagade ab gale --------------- you make me hug her (make her mine)
Tenu dil da vaasta ------------------ Am binding you with my heart’s yearning (The singer treats God like a friend/savior – so, its like – if you want my heart to keep beating…)
Rabba aaya dar digaar ke ------ God, I have come to your door (here I have a doubt, I think he says “dar pay pyaar key” – which would mean, at the lover’s door)
Sara jahan chod chaad ke ------ I have left the entire world (as only the loved one matters)
Mere sapne sawar de ---------- Make my dreams beautiful (make them real)
Tenu dil da vasta --------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Ajj din chadheya ------- Today, the day has come out
Tere rang varga -------- In your color
Baksha gunaho ko -------- You have forgiven the sins
Sun ke duwao ko ---------- by listening to prayers (spoken by sinners)
Rabba pyaar hai ----------- God, love is
Tune sab ko hi de diya ----- What you have given to everyone
Meri bhi aahon ko ---------- To my sighs too (listen to my sighs)
Sun le duwao ko ----------- listen to my prayers
Mujhko woh dila maine jisko hai dil diya ---- Give me the one to whom I have given my heart…
Aas voh pyaas voh usko de itna bata ----- She is my hope, my thirst; please tell her just this
Woh jo mujhko dekh ke hase ------------ the one who laughs on seeing me
Pana chahun raat din jise ----------------- whom I want to make mine day and night
Rabba mere naam kar use ---------------- God, assign her to me! :)
Tenu dil da vasta ------------------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang varga
Maanga jo mera hai ------------------------- I have asked you what is mine
Jaata kya tera hai ---------------------------- What do you stand to lose?
Maine kaun si tujhse jannat maang li ---------- I have not asked you for the paradise (in the sense, paradise is yours, am not asking that)
Kaisa khuda hai tu --------------------------- What kind of a God are you?
Bas naam ka hai tu --------------------------- You might be only a name afterall
Rabba jo teri itni si bhi na chali ----------- if YOU can not even deliver my asking! (In the sense, your specialty is in doing what mortals can not)
Chahiye jo mujhe -------------- What I desire
Kar de tu mujhko ata ---------- you please handover to me
Jeeti rahe saltanat teri ---------- May your lineage rejoice
Jeeti rahe ashiqui meri ---------- May my love rejoice
Dede mujhe zindagi meri -------- Give me my life to me….
Tenu dil da vasta ---------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Rabba mere din yeh na dhale
Woh jo mujhe khwab mein mile
Use tu lagade ab gale
Tenu dil da vasta
Rabba aaya dar pay yaar ke
Sara jahan chod chad ke
Mere sapne sawar de
Tenu dil da vasta
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang varga
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang vargaaaa…
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang vargaaa..
Din chadheyaaaa..
Note: Let me know if you need me to translate any other song... I would love to do it! :)
Music Director: Pritam Chakraborty
Director: Imtiaz Ali
Lyrics: Irshad Kamil
Starring: Saif Ali Khan, Deepika Padukone
Song Title: Ajj Din Chadheya
Ajj Din Chadheya
Ajj din chadheya --------- Today, the day has come outTere rang varga ---------- In your color (God is supposed to be very bright, luminescent)
Ajj din chadheya ---------- Today, the day has come out
Tere rang varga ---------- In your color
Phul sa hai khila aaj din ---- the day has blossomed like a flower
Rabba mere din yeh na dhale ----- God, my days do not see a sunset (In the sense, when day ends, my pain doesn’t)
Woh jo mujhe khwab mein mile ---- the one whom meets me in my dreams
Use tu lagade ab gale --------------- you make me hug her (make her mine)
Tenu dil da vaasta ------------------ Am binding you with my heart’s yearning (The singer treats God like a friend/savior – so, its like – if you want my heart to keep beating…)
Rabba aaya dar digaar ke ------ God, I have come to your door (here I have a doubt, I think he says “dar pay pyaar key” – which would mean, at the lover’s door)
Sara jahan chod chaad ke ------ I have left the entire world (as only the loved one matters)
Mere sapne sawar de ---------- Make my dreams beautiful (make them real)
Tenu dil da vasta --------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Ajj din chadheya ------- Today, the day has come out
Tere rang varga -------- In your color
Baksha gunaho ko -------- You have forgiven the sins
Sun ke duwao ko ---------- by listening to prayers (spoken by sinners)
Rabba pyaar hai ----------- God, love is
Tune sab ko hi de diya ----- What you have given to everyone
Meri bhi aahon ko ---------- To my sighs too (listen to my sighs)
Sun le duwao ko ----------- listen to my prayers
Mujhko woh dila maine jisko hai dil diya ---- Give me the one to whom I have given my heart…
Aas voh pyaas voh usko de itna bata ----- She is my hope, my thirst; please tell her just this
Woh jo mujhko dekh ke hase ------------ the one who laughs on seeing me
Pana chahun raat din jise ----------------- whom I want to make mine day and night
Rabba mere naam kar use ---------------- God, assign her to me! :)
Tenu dil da vasta ------------------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang varga
Maanga jo mera hai ------------------------- I have asked you what is mine
Jaata kya tera hai ---------------------------- What do you stand to lose?
Maine kaun si tujhse jannat maang li ---------- I have not asked you for the paradise (in the sense, paradise is yours, am not asking that)
Kaisa khuda hai tu --------------------------- What kind of a God are you?
Bas naam ka hai tu --------------------------- You might be only a name afterall
Rabba jo teri itni si bhi na chali ----------- if YOU can not even deliver my asking! (In the sense, your specialty is in doing what mortals can not)
Chahiye jo mujhe -------------- What I desire
Kar de tu mujhko ata ---------- you please handover to me
Jeeti rahe saltanat teri ---------- May your lineage rejoice
Jeeti rahe ashiqui meri ---------- May my love rejoice
Dede mujhe zindagi meri -------- Give me my life to me….
Tenu dil da vasta ---------------- Am binding you with my heart’s yearning…
Rabba mere din yeh na dhale
Woh jo mujhe khwab mein mile
Use tu lagade ab gale
Tenu dil da vasta
Rabba aaya dar pay yaar ke
Sara jahan chod chad ke
Mere sapne sawar de
Tenu dil da vasta
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang varga
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang vargaaaa…
Ajj din chadheya
Tere rang vargaaa..
Din chadheyaaaa..
Note: Let me know if you need me to translate any other song... I would love to do it! :)
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Some of Sahil's Sentences!
Here are some of the 'verbatim' stuff - from Sahil - jotted sometime last September...
S: "I tell. You write. OK?" ----- while doing HW.
S: "I write, then I can learn?" ----- when I insisted that he writes, so he can learn.
S: "How you know? desk is 'd', 'e' 's' 'k'? You telling when u r writing? u saw my note book?" ------ when he asked me 'desk' spelling and I told correctly.
S: "I don't want to say when I am writing. I am writing only, know?" -------- When I was insisting he reads while he writes.
S: "Can I color first, then we do home work?" -------- When he had writing and coloring to do.
S: "You help me color, please. Lets do something that I can do fast. Okay?"
S: "Mine not gone outside, see your color I think is going to go outside. You are doing so faassst know. We should not put it outside. Correct, mumma?" ------ While trying to color 'perfectly'.
S: "Okay, now I am your mother. Okay?" ----- Role-play, so he can command what needs to be done.
S: "I am the teacher. I teach you, you tell me, I ask, okay? Tell me, desk. " ----- When I asked him 'desk' spelling and he didn't know.
S: "When I become big, and I become mummy know... then you will become small know, then I take care of you, okay?" -------- This one is my favorite!! I had fun explaining he would not become 'mummy' and I would never become 'small'. :)
S: "In my school - one Aditi know, she told me 'shut up' today mumma. I felt v bad, I also told her shut up. "
M: We should not speak like that, v bad she told u like that. U don't talk like that to anyone who says bad words okay. We should never say bad words. I don't want you to say 'shut up' to anyone....
S: "Okay, next time, this time i told 'galti say' (by mistake), next time, I not say. I won't talk to anyone telling bad words, okay mumma? mumma, why is 'shut up' bad word? we should not tell 'rascal' also?" : : : (I begin to wonder.....)
S: "I tell. You write. OK?" ----- while doing HW.
S: "I write, then I can learn?" ----- when I insisted that he writes, so he can learn.
S: "How you know? desk is 'd', 'e' 's' 'k'? You telling when u r writing? u saw my note book?" ------ when he asked me 'desk' spelling and I told correctly.
S: "I don't want to say when I am writing. I am writing only, know?" -------- When I was insisting he reads while he writes.
S: "Can I color first, then we do home work?" -------- When he had writing and coloring to do.
S: "You help me color, please. Lets do something that I can do fast. Okay?"
S: "Mine not gone outside, see your color I think is going to go outside. You are doing so faassst know. We should not put it outside. Correct, mumma?" ------ While trying to color 'perfectly'.
S: "Okay, now I am your mother. Okay?" ----- Role-play, so he can command what needs to be done.
S: "I am the teacher. I teach you, you tell me, I ask, okay? Tell me, desk. " ----- When I asked him 'desk' spelling and he didn't know.
S: "When I become big, and I become mummy know... then you will become small know, then I take care of you, okay?" -------- This one is my favorite!! I had fun explaining he would not become 'mummy' and I would never become 'small'. :)
S: "In my school - one Aditi know, she told me 'shut up' today mumma. I felt v bad, I also told her shut up. "
M: We should not speak like that, v bad she told u like that. U don't talk like that to anyone who says bad words okay. We should never say bad words. I don't want you to say 'shut up' to anyone....
S: "Okay, next time, this time i told 'galti say' (by mistake), next time, I not say. I won't talk to anyone telling bad words, okay mumma? mumma, why is 'shut up' bad word? we should not tell 'rascal' also?" : : : (I begin to wonder.....)
Sunday, May 16, 2010
The Gift from "Indus Ladies" on Mother's Day!!!
Yey! This Mother's Day, I have been given a gift for being a 'Mommy Blogger'. :) No wonder, I can't stop smiling!
When there have been moments, when I have wondered,
why do I blog?
Plus, why don't I
blog all that comes to my mind?
I have given myself enough reasons and excuses.
I haven't forgotten - I began blogging as a side-effect of motherhood. :) I began with hoping to jot down all that 'being a mother' is all about. I, obviously have failed to do so... as in, not everything that makes me what I am (even just as a 'Mom') can't be reasonably jotted. Mmm... I have continued though, and plan to do so for as long as I can.
This Mother's Day - my son didn't give me a gift (like two years ago), or a card (with his dad's help). He hugged me, and with excitement in his eyes, looked at me and immediately after wishing me - asked me what "Gifttt" I was going to give him!! At that moment, I realized a profound truth I had known but never worded. I was able to think that Mother's Day is not only about celebrating your mother for being who she is -- because she is your mother all your life; it is about celebrating the bonding that exists between a parent and a child. Irrespective of who teaches whom on which day, a Mother's Day is for a mother to count her blessings and to bless her kids.
You know what? The plain act of my son asking me a 'gift' - made me ponder in what ways I can contribute as a mother, to anyone else, besides my own baby. I got some brilliant ideas and I am going to take up at least one of them. Let me see how far I take it. I will write about it in another post, hopefully out of the post-implementation excitement.
Okay, now about the 'Gift' that I got from Indus Ladies. Well, well, Indus Ladies has brought the "Mommy Bloggers" close-together by compiling an e-book, just for Us. :) :) Mm, I am listed there too, but the real joy is to get links to so many other Mommies out there - who are writing about their experiences with their kids!
If like me, you are interested in reading what other Mothers are saying/doing/going through - here's the e-book: Indus Ladies - Mommy Bloggers E-book
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Hiya! Am Back...
I came across the following quote a few months ago. I was actually captivated by the exact match of words that portray how I think. Here it is, see if it makes sense to you:
*****
Fritz Williams:
I believe in cultivating opposite, but complementary views of life, and I believe in meeting life's challenges with contradictory strategies. I believe in reckoning with the ultimate meaninglessness of our existence, even as we fall in love with the miracle of being alive. I believe in working passionately to make our lives count while never losing sight of our insignificance. I believe in caring deeply and being beyond caring. It is by encompassing these opposites, by being involved and vulnerable, but simultaneously transcendent and detached, that our lives are graced by resilience and joy.
*****
*****
Fritz Williams:
I believe in cultivating opposite, but complementary views of life, and I believe in meeting life's challenges with contradictory strategies. I believe in reckoning with the ultimate meaninglessness of our existence, even as we fall in love with the miracle of being alive. I believe in working passionately to make our lives count while never losing sight of our insignificance. I believe in caring deeply and being beyond caring. It is by encompassing these opposites, by being involved and vulnerable, but simultaneously transcendent and detached, that our lives are graced by resilience and joy.
*****
Thursday, January 7, 2010
For the Little Ones - Pending since 19Nov09
I know it pains when we read or come across some gory detail of any form of child abuse. Why am I writing about it? Do I think, my writing in my own blog can make a difference? Well, YES!
For all that I am worth, if I am asked to punish someone who is guilty of misbehaving with a kid, I won’t think twice. I wonder why we have all such cases languishing in our courts. How dare we let anyone who is ‘found guilty’ to be ‘proved innocent’ and keep the trials on for years?
If there is someone who truly moves me – It’s a kid. I am sure, most of the people I have known until now, have felt that ‘soft, caring’ feeling for the little ones. Is it because we form a society that has so much drama involved in everything that happens; we choose to hush the words when someone comes along complaining or is it that we are basically, gutless?
How many of us know and acknowledge that there are several forms of abusing a child? How many of us, bother to find out for ourselves, how many kids have faced some form of abuse? How many of us are willing to take the right steps to put an end to all this? Most important, how many of us know – what is the right preventive and curative approach?
Breaking off for a bit and adding all my other thoughts on making this a safer/better place for kids:
1. Can we ensure the school kids who commute by government buses have special buses at their service?
2. Can we ensure that whichever school it may be – there is ownership on maintaining a clean and safe environment?
a. Start with the staff.
i. Do you have a mandate in place that teachers are not allowed to raise their hands/scale/textbooks/dusters to ‘instill discipline’?
ii. Do you have a character certificate for the staff you employ? Do you think it is required? Not just the teachers, the office staff, include even the school bus drivers/conductors, ayahs and even the gardener. ---- Sounds far fetched? Well, it’s how important you think safety of a kid is!
b. Can you ensure that all the school kids reach school without their bags getting locked into some truck? – This happened yesterday to a school kid cycling to his school.
c. Can we ensure there are cycling zones for at least 4 kms near each school, in all directions? – sounds far fetched again!
d. Can we ensure our kids don’t carry the burden of bags more than half their own weight?
e. Can we ensure that we have separate toilet facilities for kids – without making them witness adults relieving themselves shamelessly?
3. Can we ensure our kids don’t carry the weight of our aspirations so much that any failure breaks their spirit?
4. Can we ensure that our kids are taught that it’s not right to bully or be bullied?
5. It isn’t enough to ban ragging. The need of the hour is to teach kids how morally wrong it is to ‘demean’ anyone in any way! The lessons need to start early…
6. Have we the courage to give the confidence to our kids that they can share whatever they want to – with us (parents/teachers) without fearing reprimand?
7. Do we make our kids aware of ‘how they can be ill treated” and what they must do in those cases?
8. Do we give them the trust that we trust them?
9. The helping hands that we employ – drivers/maids/watchmen – do we care for their welfare and treat them with dignity? Are we passing the same lessons to our kids? Are we ensuring, our kids don’t become easy targets to ‘keeping dirty secrets’?
I wish we had strict and immediate punishments, which deter the abusers from any such thoughts as well. Also, there’s a need for ‘education against abuse’. The kids know it any day when they are wronged that it’s not something right – but we need to teach them how to safeguard and speak about such incidents – in confidence to their parents. As educators, we need to tell parents that it does not right the wrong to scold or blame your child when he/she reports in such unfortunate incidents. Moreover, as a society, we need to take collective responsibility to avoid unnecessary moral policing but be willing and open to watching and initiating strong action against the wrong-doers.
As a society, can we ensure that we don’t employ girls of tender age for house-keeping? Many times, while keeping the houses clean, these girls suffer at the hands of the other keepers or the owner. It is not unusual to be beaten up if they fail in any of their duties. How many of us are aware that it is a form of abuse? When we talk of child abuse, verbal/physical abuses and domestic violence – all of it applies to children of all ages who still are not big enough to support themselves and save themselves.
Being educated ourselves; we can hope to bring in a BETTER tomorrow. For ourselves – by not committing any such abuses and for them – by sparing them any torture. Being aware is the first step. Being a human, second. Or is it the other way round? What does it take to understand another person’s pain? …
To know more about child abuse and its impact – go here - http://childsexualabuseinindia.blogspot.com
For all that I am worth, if I am asked to punish someone who is guilty of misbehaving with a kid, I won’t think twice. I wonder why we have all such cases languishing in our courts. How dare we let anyone who is ‘found guilty’ to be ‘proved innocent’ and keep the trials on for years?
If there is someone who truly moves me – It’s a kid. I am sure, most of the people I have known until now, have felt that ‘soft, caring’ feeling for the little ones. Is it because we form a society that has so much drama involved in everything that happens; we choose to hush the words when someone comes along complaining or is it that we are basically, gutless?
How many of us know and acknowledge that there are several forms of abusing a child? How many of us, bother to find out for ourselves, how many kids have faced some form of abuse? How many of us are willing to take the right steps to put an end to all this? Most important, how many of us know – what is the right preventive and curative approach?
Breaking off for a bit and adding all my other thoughts on making this a safer/better place for kids:
1. Can we ensure the school kids who commute by government buses have special buses at their service?
2. Can we ensure that whichever school it may be – there is ownership on maintaining a clean and safe environment?
a. Start with the staff.
i. Do you have a mandate in place that teachers are not allowed to raise their hands/scale/textbooks/dusters to ‘instill discipline’?
ii. Do you have a character certificate for the staff you employ? Do you think it is required? Not just the teachers, the office staff, include even the school bus drivers/conductors, ayahs and even the gardener. ---- Sounds far fetched? Well, it’s how important you think safety of a kid is!
b. Can you ensure that all the school kids reach school without their bags getting locked into some truck? – This happened yesterday to a school kid cycling to his school.
c. Can we ensure there are cycling zones for at least 4 kms near each school, in all directions? – sounds far fetched again!
d. Can we ensure our kids don’t carry the burden of bags more than half their own weight?
e. Can we ensure that we have separate toilet facilities for kids – without making them witness adults relieving themselves shamelessly?
3. Can we ensure our kids don’t carry the weight of our aspirations so much that any failure breaks their spirit?
4. Can we ensure that our kids are taught that it’s not right to bully or be bullied?
5. It isn’t enough to ban ragging. The need of the hour is to teach kids how morally wrong it is to ‘demean’ anyone in any way! The lessons need to start early…
6. Have we the courage to give the confidence to our kids that they can share whatever they want to – with us (parents/teachers) without fearing reprimand?
7. Do we make our kids aware of ‘how they can be ill treated” and what they must do in those cases?
8. Do we give them the trust that we trust them?
9. The helping hands that we employ – drivers/maids/watchmen – do we care for their welfare and treat them with dignity? Are we passing the same lessons to our kids? Are we ensuring, our kids don’t become easy targets to ‘keeping dirty secrets’?
I wish we had strict and immediate punishments, which deter the abusers from any such thoughts as well. Also, there’s a need for ‘education against abuse’. The kids know it any day when they are wronged that it’s not something right – but we need to teach them how to safeguard and speak about such incidents – in confidence to their parents. As educators, we need to tell parents that it does not right the wrong to scold or blame your child when he/she reports in such unfortunate incidents. Moreover, as a society, we need to take collective responsibility to avoid unnecessary moral policing but be willing and open to watching and initiating strong action against the wrong-doers.
As a society, can we ensure that we don’t employ girls of tender age for house-keeping? Many times, while keeping the houses clean, these girls suffer at the hands of the other keepers or the owner. It is not unusual to be beaten up if they fail in any of their duties. How many of us are aware that it is a form of abuse? When we talk of child abuse, verbal/physical abuses and domestic violence – all of it applies to children of all ages who still are not big enough to support themselves and save themselves.
Being educated ourselves; we can hope to bring in a BETTER tomorrow. For ourselves – by not committing any such abuses and for them – by sparing them any torture. Being aware is the first step. Being a human, second. Or is it the other way round? What does it take to understand another person’s pain? …
To know more about child abuse and its impact – go here - http://childsexualabuseinindia.blogspot.com
Saturday, January 2, 2010
December-09 Updates
1. Allowing him to test my gaming skills on iPod Touch has had its advantage. When I lost, I smilingly said, "I didn't practice. How could I win? Okay, I lost." Thereafter, my son seems to have understood two things. We don't need to 'feel bad' if we lose and we need to 'practice' if we want to be good at something! I get to see a big change in him when we sit to do our lessons and my dear son announces, "mumma, I am going to 'practice' everything. You ask me to write, okay? I will write all words 3 times?" [This coming from a boy who finds it too much to sit still and do his lessons! Pat on the back to me!]
Not just this, while writing, when he makes "s" like "r", when I chide, he says, "That's why I am practicing, because I not write very neatly. I will do it 'corretttly' now, see..." :)) How can I not feel proud of a willing heart!?
2. He had questions with "these" and "those". Each "these" question had to be answered starting with "these" (as expected). However, while teaching him, I asked him, "what are these?" - pointing to a set of balls. While he was thinking his answer (I am sure he was counting how many red and how many blue balls were there in the picture...), I looked at him. In my impatience to hurry him, I looked at the picture and said - "these are those". [Wanting him to decode 'those' as 'balls']. For my next question, "what are these", my son doesn't blink an eyelid and pat comes the reply - "these are those". :) [You get what you give...]
3. I love being called "kutty mumma" by my son. I call him "kutty paaapu" meaning "small baby".... and its been more than a year that my son first called me lovingly "kutty mumma". :) It feels wonderful whenever he remembers to shower me with that special "arms around my neck", "cheek-on-cheek", "kutty mumma" hug!
4. His dad takes a full pack of Britannia Cakes. While I pack sahil's tiffins, he asks me for a full pack too. As I stand to reason out, he says, "you gave full pack to my father know?". I say, "yes shona, but he has a drawer at office where he can keep it. You will waste if you take full pack and go..." and that answer doesn't satisfy my little one. Full marks if you guess what he tells next! --- "I not waste. I eat and then I bring it back okay? I help you alcho, I fill my bottle, still now you are not giving me full packet. I like that cake. You give to my daddy only fully." :)) I didn't want him to think that I love his dad more than I love him (what's love got to do with a pack of cake!). Plus, I didn't want him to think that 'filling his bottle, helping me' is a bribe that's gonna get him the cake. I was like, "Shall I keep 2 cake pieces and rest you come home and eat? How about that?" He says, "I not talk." I am left with no choice but not to let him spoil my mood and his for a pack of cake. I got a box and told him, he can take the whole pack but bring back any that he isn't able to finish, by keeping properly in the box. The monkey gets back to his 'hanging on the branch' tricks! (read - being his mom's backpack!) saying "I loveeeeeee youuuu 10 mummmmmyyyyy".
Not just this, while writing, when he makes "s" like "r", when I chide, he says, "That's why I am practicing, because I not write very neatly. I will do it 'corretttly' now, see..." :)) How can I not feel proud of a willing heart!?
2. He had questions with "these" and "those". Each "these" question had to be answered starting with "these" (as expected). However, while teaching him, I asked him, "what are these?" - pointing to a set of balls. While he was thinking his answer (I am sure he was counting how many red and how many blue balls were there in the picture...), I looked at him. In my impatience to hurry him, I looked at the picture and said - "these are those". [Wanting him to decode 'those' as 'balls']. For my next question, "what are these", my son doesn't blink an eyelid and pat comes the reply - "these are those". :) [You get what you give...]
3. I love being called "kutty mumma" by my son. I call him "kutty paaapu" meaning "small baby".... and its been more than a year that my son first called me lovingly "kutty mumma". :) It feels wonderful whenever he remembers to shower me with that special "arms around my neck", "cheek-on-cheek", "kutty mumma" hug!
4. His dad takes a full pack of Britannia Cakes. While I pack sahil's tiffins, he asks me for a full pack too. As I stand to reason out, he says, "you gave full pack to my father know?". I say, "yes shona, but he has a drawer at office where he can keep it. You will waste if you take full pack and go..." and that answer doesn't satisfy my little one. Full marks if you guess what he tells next! --- "I not waste. I eat and then I bring it back okay? I help you alcho, I fill my bottle, still now you are not giving me full packet. I like that cake. You give to my daddy only fully." :)) I didn't want him to think that I love his dad more than I love him (what's love got to do with a pack of cake!). Plus, I didn't want him to think that 'filling his bottle, helping me' is a bribe that's gonna get him the cake. I was like, "Shall I keep 2 cake pieces and rest you come home and eat? How about that?" He says, "I not talk." I am left with no choice but not to let him spoil my mood and his for a pack of cake. I got a box and told him, he can take the whole pack but bring back any that he isn't able to finish, by keeping properly in the box. The monkey gets back to his 'hanging on the branch' tricks! (read - being his mom's backpack!) saying "I loveeeeeee youuuu 10 mummmmmyyyyy".
Yey!! It's New Year Again!
A very Happy New Year to all my friends out there!
Wish you all loads of happiness, good health and many joyful moments in the year ahead.
--- Warm regards.
Wish you all loads of happiness, good health and many joyful moments in the year ahead.
--- Warm regards.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Some of Our Chats
Long pending update. :) Here are some of the chats between my little fellow and his mom (me!)
White Shoes:
S: Mumma, today white trousers and white shoessss?
M: Yes shona.
S: Why, mumma?
M: Its Monday na today, that's y.
S: Oh, okay. Then, tomomorrow? (yeah, that's how he says tomorrow!)
M: Tomorrow, you will wear blue shorts and black shoes.
S: How do you know, mumma? (Does he think I don't have a brain? ;))
M: Shonu, it's Tuesday na tomorrow, that's y.
S: Oh okay. How do you know, Tuesday tomomorrow?
M: Shonuuu! Today is Monday, then Tuesday, Wednesday,Thursday, Friday,Saturday, Sunday and again Monday will come. That's how days are.
S: Okay mumma. (little silently this time, I end up thinking, did I react little strongly to the last question!?!)
Without a minute's pause, S: Why it is Monday today? :-)
Can you answer why a day is what day it is!??!
While playing with his dad:
S: Mumma, papa is pushinggg meeeee.
M: Why shonu? what happened?
S: I don't know.
M: What did you do? Why is papa pushing you?
S: I did not do yennything ('anything'). Papa is simpleee pushing me.
M: Papa is simply pushing you? Wait, I'll ask Papa why he is pushing you.
J: We are playing. (No justification, just facts!)
S: No mumma. When we playing know, I pushed papa. Then, papa pushing me nicely. I not playing with papa, but papa is simply pushing me. (---Am thinking --- Means, so long as he is winning, it's all okay? When he begins to get pushed, he isn't playing anymore! I have to instill the importance of playing - not just winning...)
M: :-) Okay, don't play. You come to the kitchen with me.
J: Good.
S: Not good papa. Come, let's fight.
M: I am going to the kitchen. If you get hurt again don't come crying to me. Okay?
S: Okay. I not cry. I am big boy know. I fight with papa. See. I am strong. Come papa. Let's fight. See my musssels (muscles)! (provokes for fighting! true ninja!)
The nonsense fun continues. :-)
While eating food
S: I don't want more mumma. My stomach is full. Touch and see.
M: Little more shonu. Last time?
S: I aten (ate + en = past tense of eaten) fully mumma.
M: :-) Okay.
After 5 minutes:
S: Mumma, give me more food mumma. When I finish my food know, papa is going to give me something special.
M: Hmm, okay. You will become big and strong also...when you finish your food.
S: I am big and strong mumma. I am dinking complan everyday. Yessss. (by the time I am publishing this, he says drinking properly.)
On passing by Naani's Ex-house:
S: We not going to naani's house?
M: Saku, I told you, naani is staying with us now, right? So we will go to our house.
S: Somebody is there in naani house? Tell me mumma. (He partly remembers what I had explained the last time he had asked me this question.)
M: Yes shonu. Now, someone else is staying in naani's house. So, we can't go and stay there.
S: Oh okay. Why mumma?
M: What 'why' sahil? I told you na, the house-owner has asked someone else to stay there.
S: Oh okay, that's why naani staying in our house?
M: yes saku.Now our house is naani's house also.
S: Oh okay. That is papa's house alcho. Correct mumma?
M: My darling baby. yes. It's everyone's house.
S: but ajay, nikhil, debbie not staying in our house. correct mumma? (I feel like screaming.... the other kids at creche stay in their houses, why will they stay in ours!!?!)
White Shoes:
S: Mumma, today white trousers and white shoessss?
M: Yes shona.
S: Why, mumma?
M: Its Monday na today, that's y.
S: Oh, okay. Then, tomomorrow? (yeah, that's how he says tomorrow!)
M: Tomorrow, you will wear blue shorts and black shoes.
S: How do you know, mumma? (Does he think I don't have a brain? ;))
M: Shonu, it's Tuesday na tomorrow, that's y.
S: Oh okay. How do you know, Tuesday tomomorrow?
M: Shonuuu! Today is Monday, then Tuesday, Wednesday,Thursday, Friday,Saturday, Sunday and again Monday will come. That's how days are.
S: Okay mumma. (little silently this time, I end up thinking, did I react little strongly to the last question!?!)
Without a minute's pause, S: Why it is Monday today? :-)
Can you answer why a day is what day it is!??!
While playing with his dad:
S: Mumma, papa is pushinggg meeeee.
M: Why shonu? what happened?
S: I don't know.
M: What did you do? Why is papa pushing you?
S: I did not do yennything ('anything'). Papa is simpleee pushing me.
M: Papa is simply pushing you? Wait, I'll ask Papa why he is pushing you.
J: We are playing. (No justification, just facts!)
S: No mumma. When we playing know, I pushed papa. Then, papa pushing me nicely. I not playing with papa, but papa is simply pushing me. (---Am thinking --- Means, so long as he is winning, it's all okay? When he begins to get pushed, he isn't playing anymore! I have to instill the importance of playing - not just winning...)
M: :-) Okay, don't play. You come to the kitchen with me.
J: Good.
S: Not good papa. Come, let's fight.
M: I am going to the kitchen. If you get hurt again don't come crying to me. Okay?
S: Okay. I not cry. I am big boy know. I fight with papa. See. I am strong. Come papa. Let's fight. See my musssels (muscles)! (provokes for fighting! true ninja!)
The nonsense fun continues. :-)
While eating food
S: I don't want more mumma. My stomach is full. Touch and see.
M: Little more shonu. Last time?
S: I aten (ate + en = past tense of eaten) fully mumma.
M: :-) Okay.
After 5 minutes:
S: Mumma, give me more food mumma. When I finish my food know, papa is going to give me something special.
M: Hmm, okay. You will become big and strong also...when you finish your food.
S: I am big and strong mumma. I am dinking complan everyday. Yessss. (by the time I am publishing this, he says drinking properly.)
On passing by Naani's Ex-house:
S: We not going to naani's house?
M: Saku, I told you, naani is staying with us now, right? So we will go to our house.
S: Somebody is there in naani house? Tell me mumma. (He partly remembers what I had explained the last time he had asked me this question.)
M: Yes shonu. Now, someone else is staying in naani's house. So, we can't go and stay there.
S: Oh okay. Why mumma?
M: What 'why' sahil? I told you na, the house-owner has asked someone else to stay there.
S: Oh okay, that's why naani staying in our house?
M: yes saku.Now our house is naani's house also.
S: Oh okay. That is papa's house alcho. Correct mumma?
M: My darling baby. yes. It's everyone's house.
S: but ajay, nikhil, debbie not staying in our house. correct mumma? (I feel like screaming.... the other kids at creche stay in their houses, why will they stay in ours!!?!)
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Making a Date!
Okay, enough of this/that/these/those (yeah, that's been my son's English portion, but I am not talking about that!)... :) I mean, I am making a date tonight with my blog and that's exactly I am going to remain awake to do!
Office work has been hectic and yeah, some interesting personal commitments too...topped with sahil/jeshee dear falling sick lately. Imagine, last entry was on Apr29! I feel so bad, don't want to let go of so many things that have happened in the last 3-5 months! :((((
So, here it is. :) I will be back online tonight, just hold on...
Office work has been hectic and yeah, some interesting personal commitments too...topped with sahil/jeshee dear falling sick lately. Imagine, last entry was on Apr29! I feel so bad, don't want to let go of so many things that have happened in the last 3-5 months! :((((
So, here it is. :) I will be back online tonight, just hold on...
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
How to vote for my entry!!!
Okay Guys, some of you have been wondering how to vote for my article (either because U have read and liked my article or simply!) .... :-) here's the link:
Link for Voting:
http://indusladies.com/partners/poll.php
Link to all entries:
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/blogs/phoenixritu/thank-you-so-much-people-1850/
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Angels Awaited...
My entry for the "Mother's Day Blog Contest" ...
What has becoming a mother done to me? How exciting it felt, when I was going to be a mother? How incredible it was to hear the heartbeat of my baby within me, for the first time? How joyful were those months while we and my body prepared to bring home the baby? How touching it was to touch tenderly the little new-born? What a roller-coaster ride it has been ever since? How does it feel, to be a mother? How difficult and emotional it is, to become a mother? How different it is, to feel as a mother all the time? All these questions can make so many of us write pages and pages on our own individual feelings and also, the collective emotions. Against all this, a sad recent thought, lingers on these days. Where are we heading? How tough it is becoming, to become a mother?
It’s only on becoming a mother though; several new feelings have come to the fore. Besides becoming a mother itself being an overwhelming experience, being a mother has taught me several things already and the experience seems forever enriching. The tender feelings I feel as a mother, while being precarious for my child, have powered my thoughts on several other mothers of different generations.
I am able to feel much more strongly than ever before, about the mothers who were and are even now, never offered a choice. Whether it was about starting a family, about keeping the numbers low or even about being able to add years between the kids. Don’t we all know how strong the societal pressures have been for generations, to beget a son? Just like an heir to a throne!
In all we value about being mothers, there are so many moments of realization. Doesn’t it create an unknown bonding when we come across someone who is on her way to becoming a mother? Women looking slightly pot-bellied have a charm of their own. We, who have successfully crossed the bridge and moved into motherhood, feel happy for such on-the-way ones. A smile between women, says it all.
Sadly, just around the corner are few other women, who are just waiting. Waiting, in the hope that soon their tests would turn positive too. They too, would have the joy of feeling a life blossoming within and hold one of their own, close to their hearts. They are the dream mothers - women, who are waiting to be entrusted with the promise of bringing a life into the world. My heart goes out to all such women, who long to hold a baby of their own.
In today's fast life, where almost everything is becoming 'planned', God seems to have chosen to remind us mortals that - we are not in control of everything! Yes, a majority of us can and do 'Plan' - to marry, to opt for a career and eventually, start a family. Somehow, somewhere along the plans, someone seems to have spilt some oil on the floor. For some of us, the natural act of childbearing seems to be becoming fruitless.
To a large extent, the essence of motherhood starts with the acknowledgement of a life blossoming within. A decade or so ago, it would seem troublesome if one out of twenty married women neighbors didn't bear a child within the first two years. Times have changed for the worse. It is becoming more and more painful and common to witness the other side getting crowded. With late marriages, successful careers, unhealthy eating habits, intentional waiting period coupled with unexplainable reasons - some of the women seem to be paying the price too high already.
Most touchy are the cases where the cause of infertility isn't clear and the wait seems to be endless. How can you cure something when you don't even know why and what of the situation? How long can you wait patiently, maintain your temperament, in the hope that maybe, next cycle, results would turn positive?
Trust me, most of these are very strong women and are plunging headlong to set right the wrongs.
I am aware of some of my friends trying to wade through this torture. Few have given up their careers, in the hope that treatment and low-pressure will work soon. Others are trying to absorb the medical analysis/treatment into their routine as if it’s just another slice of life... I see some others, tired of the long wait and now looking at adoptions as the last resort. Some of us may be quick to say, "Well, maybe, adoption is the way to go." But having had the joy of carrying my little one within me and having brought him into this world, I do feel compassionate towards their natural loss.
Of course, there is no stopping to 'feeling like a mother', even if your child is not yours biologically. So long as there is love in the heart, warmth in the hug and care in the bonding; many women will find kids to love. This mother's day, being a mother, I am hoping for a miracle in their lives and join my hands to pray for them and theirs-to-be.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Recent Melody of My Pied Piper
1. Good Night Guys - While I was in US, saku announced one night to his dad - "Good Night Guys". with a smile. Jeshee was pleasantly surprised as that is his way of switching himself off!! :-)
2. Ammmama....annamaaa - One fine day, saku kept calling me as "Ammamaa" and "Annnamaaa". Thats the way he addresses his Grandmother and GreatGrandmother!
3. Gifthh - aeroplane and gifthhh
4. Laptop for meeeeee??
5. Cart-wheel Trials
6. Ajay "dous" instead of does. (do + esss)
7. The "Why" man - "why we going on mum's bike?", "why papa not dropping me to school?", "why we staying in naaani house?", "why you missed me when you gone in the US?", "why khushi didi not staying in my house?", "why we going in the big van?".
8. I went in the Taxi know, I take you now in Taxi. Yesss, seriously.
9. I want to eat Vegeeetable. Ladies finger only.
10. One day, one day papa know, take me to d beach know, one doggy coming near papa. Then know, papa walking fast. After chumtime know, sahil ask papa, "why papa walking fast?".
11. Understands jokes! - washing the bathroom; broom hanging - witch house?
12. mimics my laugh as taught by his dad!! (hehahaha)
13. lather, loofah and fun!
14. He tries to lift his eye upper lid and all that!!!!! He doesnt get it right yet...but wonder who taught him that at crechei am trying my best to stop him.
15. Like on opening fridge he says, "mummy, when I small know, I not can open the fridge, Yesss, I not can do. Now I open the fridge know. I am big boy now."
16. The other day in park, he went (climbed and came down) a high arched circular hanging mettalic exercise type swing and I was - flabbergasted at all that my son could do, all by
himself!! Thanks to the Monkey Genes in him? ;-)
2. Ammmama....annamaaa - One fine day, saku kept calling me as "Ammamaa" and "Annnamaaa". Thats the way he addresses his Grandmother and GreatGrandmother!
3. Gifthh - aeroplane and gifthhh
4. Laptop for meeeeee??
5. Cart-wheel Trials
6. Ajay "dous" instead of does. (do + esss)
7. The "Why" man - "why we going on mum's bike?", "why papa not dropping me to school?", "why we staying in naaani house?", "why you missed me when you gone in the US?", "why khushi didi not staying in my house?", "why we going in the big van?".
8. I went in the Taxi know, I take you now in Taxi. Yesss, seriously.
9. I want to eat Vegeeetable. Ladies finger only.
10. One day, one day papa know, take me to d beach know, one doggy coming near papa. Then know, papa walking fast. After chumtime know, sahil ask papa, "why papa walking fast?".
11. Understands jokes! - washing the bathroom; broom hanging - witch house?
12. mimics my laugh as taught by his dad!! (hehahaha)
13. lather, loofah and fun!
14. He tries to lift his eye upper lid and all that!!!!! He doesnt get it right yet...but wonder who taught him that at crechei am trying my best to stop him.
15. Like on opening fridge he says, "mummy, when I small know, I not can open the fridge, Yesss, I not can do. Now I open the fridge know. I am big boy now."
16. The other day in park, he went (climbed and came down) a high arched circular hanging mettalic exercise type swing and I was - flabbergasted at all that my son could do, all by
himself!! Thanks to the Monkey Genes in him? ;-)
New Year - Bidding Farewell to 2008...
This has been the year when....
1. My son turned 3.
:-)2. My son started proper school - St. John's - LKG B (his Pre-Kg lasted 5 months).
3. My bro shifted to Qatar.
4. My hubby got PMP certified.
5. I made my first trip to US (minus family!)
6. Some lessons learnt regarding bonding with people.
7. My mum vacated her home (year end).
8. I started blogging about my father and on Tech Writing (lots to add as content though).
9. My younger sis confirmed her good news. :-)))
10. I changed my job for a career :-) finally (or so I think until now....)
11. My Bro-in-law and family moved to Riyadh.
12. I met Bill in US. :-)
13. I met and stayed with our friend and ex-colleague Malar and her hubby Bahu at US.
14. I sent out the maid who was taking my patience for granted and struggled happily for almost 3 months!
15. I understood, in life, when you take steps to work at something, you can only Improve yourself. Its the commitment and willingness to do more, that must keep you
going.
16. My son started writing - even when I wasn't holding his palm. (Dec time frame)
17. I got myself a smart frame (for my glasses) as Sahil had broken a good one when he was very small and I didn't want to invest in something expensive again - until this year - when hubby insisted!
18. I broke my old mobile by mistake - and got a nice one - with camera - as surprise.
19. We got a Calendar of family photos done for my in-laws. :-)
20. I stayed with my mother latter part of the year and my son enjoyed having his Maamu staying close to our home.
21. My bike completed its 1st anniversary!
22. Many times, sahil slept off on our way home on my bike! and his Maamu or dad or both came to our rescue. :-)
1. My son turned 3.
:-)2. My son started proper school - St. John's - LKG B (his Pre-Kg lasted 5 months).
3. My bro shifted to Qatar.
4. My hubby got PMP certified.
5. I made my first trip to US (minus family!)
6. Some lessons learnt regarding bonding with people.
7. My mum vacated her home (year end).
8. I started blogging about my father and on Tech Writing (lots to add as content though).
9. My younger sis confirmed her good news. :-)))
10. I changed my job for a career :-) finally (or so I think until now....)
11. My Bro-in-law and family moved to Riyadh.
12. I met Bill in US. :-)
13. I met and stayed with our friend and ex-colleague Malar and her hubby Bahu at US.
14. I sent out the maid who was taking my patience for granted and struggled happily for almost 3 months!
15. I understood, in life, when you take steps to work at something, you can only Improve yourself. Its the commitment and willingness to do more, that must keep you
going.
16. My son started writing - even when I wasn't holding his palm. (Dec time frame)
17. I got myself a smart frame (for my glasses) as Sahil had broken a good one when he was very small and I didn't want to invest in something expensive again - until this year - when hubby insisted!
18. I broke my old mobile by mistake - and got a nice one - with camera - as surprise.
19. We got a Calendar of family photos done for my in-laws. :-)
20. I stayed with my mother latter part of the year and my son enjoyed having his Maamu staying close to our home.
21. My bike completed its 1st anniversary!
22. Many times, sahil slept off on our way home on my bike! and his Maamu or dad or both came to our rescue. :-)
More Things to Jot Down
* Mum as story-teller
* When will be my Happy Bday?
* Frustration - 11Dec08 - unable to pull his pants up by himself!
* Big know - now I can open the fridge.
* we not going to papa house? Nani house only?
* Waheyguru - satnam* Meray betay ko big and strong bana do.
* When I make sound like that know, big potty come.
Binoy Appan's Wedding
1. Flushing happiness
2. Button - becoming a master
3. Fall from the table :-(
Vacating Mum's Home
25Dec08
Didnt take saku for Santa seeing :-((( More of a disappointment for me than for him.
1. Belti - means -
2. Nani- so sweet of u
3. Repeating forbidden habit- never-ending "last" for everything!
4. Calling deepi masi/meenu masi as amy masi, when corrected, asks,"then, whoisamymasi?"
2007
1. Sahil started Pre-Kg in October. :-) 2. Was it in 2007 Dec that we went to Pondy?
* When will be my Happy Bday?
* Frustration - 11Dec08 - unable to pull his pants up by himself!
* Big know - now I can open the fridge.
* we not going to papa house? Nani house only?
* Waheyguru - satnam* Meray betay ko big and strong bana do.
* When I make sound like that know, big potty come.
Binoy Appan's Wedding
1. Flushing happiness
2. Button - becoming a master
3. Fall from the table :-(
Vacating Mum's Home
25Dec08
Didnt take saku for Santa seeing :-((( More of a disappointment for me than for him.
1. Belti - means -
2. Nani- so sweet of u
3. Repeating forbidden habit- never-ending "last" for everything!
4. Calling deepi masi/meenu masi as amy masi, when corrected, asks,"then, whoisamymasi?"
2007
1. Sahil started Pre-Kg in October. :-) 2. Was it in 2007 Dec that we went to Pondy?
Wishlist for 09
1. More Family holidays (just the 3 of us) - jungle safaris etc.
2. More achievements - professionally.
3. Professionally learn - Glass Painting.
4. Exercise - routinely.
5. Practise writing more with Sahil. :-)
6. Create a family album.
7. Sort the paper clutter routinely. :-)
8. Complete long pending tasks (~)
9. Update blog more often. (Record life as it passes)
10. Take time out - for more adventurous/fun-filled activities.
11. Take Sahil cycling regularly.
2. More achievements - professionally.
3. Professionally learn - Glass Painting.
4. Exercise - routinely.
5. Practise writing more with Sahil. :-)
6. Create a family album.
7. Sort the paper clutter routinely. :-)
8. Complete long pending tasks (~)
9. Update blog more often. (Record life as it passes)
10. Take time out - for more adventurous/fun-filled activities.
11. Take Sahil cycling regularly.
What was that, about Satyam, pardon?
Yeah, I know, its been the hottest and most-boiling topic of all discussions last 3 days now. How, Why and What is all clear, except - where from here. What bothers me?
Well, having been with Satyam (and having considered working there one of the best times of all my work-experiences...) I feel, its a very grave situation. More importantly, my hubby is with Satyam. So, any stone-hurled at Satyam, causes concern to both of us.
No doubt, like everyone else, we have been shell-shocked with the startling revelations and the aftermath has just begun. Last night (back then when saga unfolded), we watched a channel where a student who had an offer-letter from Satyam was wondering about his chances. :-( I was thinking, about those who have put in their hard-work/time/energy/effort/life for long (including hubby).... Nah, it won't be the truth if I said, "am not worried". I know, its becoming more or less an economic imbalance and somehow or the other, some solution (probably merger, acquisition, take-over....call it what you may) - will take care of some part of the problem. What then? Obviously, not all 52000 odd employees are going to be absorbed (those not on bench are now on same edgy feeling as those on bench)... and not all existing clients are going to be able
to keep the faith. In what? :-(
Well, what's in store will be clear as time passes. As some channels reported, most of the "let me see if I can get a job before I am asked to leave mine" mind-sets have already fuelled the job portals. What that can do in reverse is - to enable offers much lesser than achievments already made (in terms of pay packages - please don't forget the EMIs!!!!) or make a "parking lot" of the over-available lot while things simmer.
As it is, with recession in, there was an insecurity and people were beginning to "cut down" on extras. Now, with a pool of employable-talents waiting to be made-to-feel-secured, what is to be expected?...
So long as the work-layer continues at Satyam offices, something will come through soon. Blames and excuses, names and games will continue to flood the channels...but who gets impacted to what degree, remains to be seen. Until then, there's only hope of a better tomorrow...
**********
Jan13: Govt has set its own board, to iron out issues at Satyam. My hubby's client has visited them - confidence building. Some signs of improvement...
Recently: Govt. first declared (atleast some channels reported that) it would support Satyam with a Bailout for 2000 Cr. (that might suffice salaries for employees for next 4 months).
Now, that step has been retraced as Govt. adds more board members and re-assessing Satyam; there may be manageable recievables of 1700 Cr by Satyam. PWC says it 'trusted' Satyam's paperwork...
Things may improve. Not the right time for market to poach employees or clients, so everyone is waiting and watching ........
20Feb09
There was speculation about Jan salaries, thankfully, those came through. One hurdle crossed - by the new management in charge now. Doubts exist still in the minds of all, irrespective of the open-communication to some extent within the organization. Everyone is hoping for stability and security to replace the "what-may-happen-is-a-question" feeling.
********
Perfect article - satyam and lies - what a prespective!http://ibnlive.in.com/blogs/ahmedalishaik/2200/53151/satyam-scam--politics-media--lies.html
Well, having been with Satyam (and having considered working there one of the best times of all my work-experiences...) I feel, its a very grave situation. More importantly, my hubby is with Satyam. So, any stone-hurled at Satyam, causes concern to both of us.
No doubt, like everyone else, we have been shell-shocked with the startling revelations and the aftermath has just begun. Last night (back then when saga unfolded), we watched a channel where a student who had an offer-letter from Satyam was wondering about his chances. :-( I was thinking, about those who have put in their hard-work/time/energy/effort/life for long (including hubby).... Nah, it won't be the truth if I said, "am not worried". I know, its becoming more or less an economic imbalance and somehow or the other, some solution (probably merger, acquisition, take-over....call it what you may) - will take care of some part of the problem. What then? Obviously, not all 52000 odd employees are going to be absorbed (those not on bench are now on same edgy feeling as those on bench)... and not all existing clients are going to be able
to keep the faith. In what? :-(
Well, what's in store will be clear as time passes. As some channels reported, most of the "let me see if I can get a job before I am asked to leave mine" mind-sets have already fuelled the job portals. What that can do in reverse is - to enable offers much lesser than achievments already made (in terms of pay packages - please don't forget the EMIs!!!!) or make a "parking lot" of the over-available lot while things simmer.
As it is, with recession in, there was an insecurity and people were beginning to "cut down" on extras. Now, with a pool of employable-talents waiting to be made-to-feel-secured, what is to be expected?...
So long as the work-layer continues at Satyam offices, something will come through soon. Blames and excuses, names and games will continue to flood the channels...but who gets impacted to what degree, remains to be seen. Until then, there's only hope of a better tomorrow...
**********
Jan13: Govt has set its own board, to iron out issues at Satyam. My hubby's client has visited them - confidence building. Some signs of improvement...
Recently: Govt. first declared (atleast some channels reported that) it would support Satyam with a Bailout for 2000 Cr. (that might suffice salaries for employees for next 4 months).
Now, that step has been retraced as Govt. adds more board members and re-assessing Satyam; there may be manageable recievables of 1700 Cr by Satyam. PWC says it 'trusted' Satyam's paperwork...
Things may improve. Not the right time for market to poach employees or clients, so everyone is waiting and watching ........
20Feb09
There was speculation about Jan salaries, thankfully, those came through. One hurdle crossed - by the new management in charge now. Doubts exist still in the minds of all, irrespective of the open-communication to some extent within the organization. Everyone is hoping for stability and security to replace the "what-may-happen-is-a-question" feeling.
********
Perfect article - satyam and lies - what a prespective!http://ibnlive.in.com/blogs/ahmedalishaik/2200/53151/satyam-scam--politics-media--lies.html
More to Note
Jan 22 09
There is total sync between what Ithink and what Isay. Thats why, I say without delay. :-)
05Feb09
1. Engagement details - pankaj bhaiya (and saku details)
2. US trip - you are goingto cleannn meee?
3. soaps and prices!
There is total sync between what Ithink and what Isay. Thats why, I say without delay. :-)
05Feb09
1. Engagement details - pankaj bhaiya (and saku details)
2. US trip - you are goingto cleannn meee?
3. soaps and prices!
24-Feb-09 - Sahil and a Complaint
Two weeks ago, I was complaining about my son's classmate who hit him. :-( Today, someone has told me that my son hits his daughter in the class sometimes! I do not know what to say. Am I more embarrased than angry? Maybe. I am not angry, actually. I am beginning to get concerned, what makes my son hit someone in his class? I have asked the father to find out instances for which my son has displayed anger. I have known my little one to be naughty yes, but, not violent so far. Well, he does playfully fight with his dad, but don't all 4 year old boys do that?? Hmm... maybe I am overreacting. Its afterall "a normal thing" and my son will "outgrow" his "display of strength" soon. But yeah, I don't want to and nor will, leave it unattended. I will speak to him and find out, what happened. Why am I like this man! But, see, the conversation
that I/Saku and then Hubby/Saku and We/Saku had. It was another learning experience in Child-Management!
(Read Tantrum/Truth/Kid/School/Fight/Tell/Beat/Snacks/Maam tags into it!)
*****
Me: Sahil, beta do u fight with anyone in ur class?
saku: no mamma.
me: are you sure, u did not fight with anybodddy in school?
saku: no mumma. I not fight with anybooodyyy.
me: okay. somone was telling me you are fighting sometimes.
saku: who was telling mumma? I not fight, am telling you know. I not talk to you.
Me: Oh, dont be upset saku, am just asking. I want you to tell me the truth, beta.
Saku: am telling truth only. I not talk to you.
*** I break the conversation and lead it to other fun things...before I start again.
Me:
To be continued...
that I/Saku and then Hubby/Saku and We/Saku had. It was another learning experience in Child-Management!
(Read Tantrum/Truth/Kid/School/Fight/Tell/Beat/Snacks/Maam tags into it!)
*****
Me: Sahil, beta do u fight with anyone in ur class?
saku: no mamma.
me: are you sure, u did not fight with anybodddy in school?
saku: no mumma. I not fight with anybooodyyy.
me: okay. somone was telling me you are fighting sometimes.
saku: who was telling mumma? I not fight, am telling you know. I not talk to you.
Me: Oh, dont be upset saku, am just asking. I want you to tell me the truth, beta.
Saku: am telling truth only. I not talk to you.
*** I break the conversation and lead it to other fun things...before I start again.
Me:
To be continued...
3-Mar-09 - Amy is a Mum Today...
Amy's baby is born!!! Longing to touch and hold the new little one and welcome her into the family. family. oh... am missing my father while I think of amy's baby.
11-Mar-09 - Holi
My Thots on 11Mar09 and snaps of same evening
What the heck? How long am I going to keep postponing my appointment with my blog?:-( scribbles here and scribbles there... but none that speak of how fast life is running past us and "we" are losing some of the "we" that we used to be!
The first quarter of this year is round the corner and well... my blog is yet to see the "Happy New Year" post! :-( Shame on me. Whom am I kidding that I am busy-busy-busy bee??
I don't want to be this busy that I forget or overlook what I don't want to leave behind. Grrrrrrrrrrr.... I am posting all that I have scribbled lately and then, when time permits... No. When I MAKE TIME for adding explanations to my scribbles, I will do so. :-)
Am feeling sad that this day used to be one of the most fun-filled once upon a time... especially during school. Colours never cost as much as sparklers, so I guess, it was more welcome a festival than Diwali. hehe. :-)
Water balloons! I have to do it with my son, Man! Okay, am buying colours and picking my little one and am going to wait for hubby to join us in the fun, when he gets home. No more - I wish we would celebrate holi like I used to. :-)) If not today, then when? This year too would pass...soon. My dear son - Colours/Water/Balloons/Fun/Young Feeling ... here we come. :-)
Will this color go, mamma?
Anyway, who cares?
Yeah...it was fun!!!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Scribbles - On Mumbai and More...1Dec08 and 3Dec08
3Dec08
1. Hereafter, once again just like how it was earlier...
will jot down what comes and what I wish to retain
in my mind's eye!
2. My son says,"Mumma I not can write"...
Because he is over-comfortable
with his palm encased within mine,
while he tries to form the letters and numbers.
Small Palm encased in mine
3. I am making him overcome
his so-called-fears and inhibitions...
he is picking on, learning.
He notices when I remove my palm
and he stops letter-forming.
Repeats - "Mummy, Sahil not can write."
4. I know it, deep within
so does he.
He can and yes, while I hold the palm
its he who is writing.
I am building his confidence
each day, when with conviction I say -
"Sahil, wow! see ... what you wrote,
so beautifully!"
I have to make him see, something that doesn't exist completely...
for him to be able to get motivated
and complete the "forming".
5. Yesterday and day-before
I have been stumped.
He has taken the pencil
formed some letters and shown me.
Am I Glad!?!
I am Overjoyed.
6. Last weekend, two note-books I bought.
Want to see the progress the little one makes...
as I help him learn to write independently.
Had a thot - "More lessons learnt than taught".
7. For small letter 'f',
We make a game.
Draw a T shirt, then a pant
and then, put a belt!
8. When saku announces d is b,
I have the Taaray Zameen Par
frisking infront of me.
As a consolation, he realises his mistake
and puts me at ease.
9. Luckily, someone told me,
all children make funny connections
when they learn letters and numbers.
No wonder, his 2 looks like a duck!
10. Suddenly, he announces after dinner -
"Mumma, let's have some fruit."I am suprised and happy
for little fellow remembering a healthy habit...
I am soon reminded, all he wants
is some more time before sleep - to remain a brute!
1 Dec 08
1. Yeah. I have forgotten...
wat it felt to write
what comes to the mind.......
as I try to 'sift' my thots!
2. Strange. Only when mind is blank
there seems to be so much
pending that needs to be drowned
in the inkpot....
paper seems to be flying!
3. What is it that I thot I would pen down now?
Is it becoz I worked hard today
I seem to be getting back to the track!?!
4. Last month ended yesterday.
Thank God!
Wonder what caused so much pain
so much trouble...at time felt total loss of control...
Now getting back to usual...seem like a Bliss!
5. What have the Mumbai attacks done to me?
I don't know. The pain, senseless-ness,
so much of emotional turmoil and yet
I somehow want to put it all behind.
Their loss, reminds me of mine...
different reasons, different times...
still...pain is what unites.
6. Why cant someone put a stop to all this and more...
that comes to my mind?
Where are we heading with this mindless blood-shed?
7. Sometime back, I recall now...I read..
how when a small boy tried giving a fallen bag...
to the bike-fellows....he lost his life in that good act!
I felt horrible then....feel the same now.
8. How do we identify and keep the attackers at bay?
Where is there any security?
How come, each-time something sad happens,
so many of us feel sad, but then, move on???
Is it just okay to feel sorry and move on?
What should I do? I am lost again...
as I have my own home to take care of...
Mine are mine while I am also alive only.....
:-(
9. My dear son asks me why I am watching
a burning building with rapt attention...
What can I do dear one?
I am wondering...how much more we are to witness....
10. I miss being fearless.
I miss being careless.
I miss being happy.
Yes, matter of time, I would soon be fine again.
What about those for whom lots has changed...
for no fault of theirs?
11. Whose resignation would make what difference?
How do we identify the killers?
What can be done to catch the offender before the offence?
But Pappu Can't Catch Sala...........
I have been stumped.
He has taken the pencil
formed some letters and shown me.
Am I Glad!?!
I am Overjoyed.
6. Last weekend, two note-books I bought.
Want to see the progress the little one makes...
as I help him learn to write independently.
Had a thot - "More lessons learnt than taught".
7. For small letter 'f',
We make a game.
Draw a T shirt, then a pant
and then, put a belt!
8. When saku announces d is b,
I have the Taaray Zameen Par
frisking infront of me.
As a consolation, he realises his mistake
and puts me at ease.
9. Luckily, someone told me,
all children make funny connections
when they learn letters and numbers.
No wonder, his 2 looks like a duck!
10. Suddenly, he announces after dinner -
"Mumma, let's have some fruit."I am suprised and happy
for little fellow remembering a healthy habit...
I am soon reminded, all he wants
is some more time before sleep - to remain a brute!
1 Dec 08
1. Yeah. I have forgotten...
wat it felt to write
what comes to the mind.......
as I try to 'sift' my thots!
2. Strange. Only when mind is blank
there seems to be so much
pending that needs to be drowned
in the inkpot....
paper seems to be flying!
3. What is it that I thot I would pen down now?
Is it becoz I worked hard today
I seem to be getting back to the track!?!
4. Last month ended yesterday.
Thank God!
Wonder what caused so much pain
so much trouble...at time felt total loss of control...
Now getting back to usual...seem like a Bliss!
5. What have the Mumbai attacks done to me?
I don't know. The pain, senseless-ness,
so much of emotional turmoil and yet
I somehow want to put it all behind.
Their loss, reminds me of mine...
different reasons, different times...
still...pain is what unites.
6. Why cant someone put a stop to all this and more...
that comes to my mind?
Where are we heading with this mindless blood-shed?
7. Sometime back, I recall now...I read..
how when a small boy tried giving a fallen bag...
to the bike-fellows....he lost his life in that good act!
I felt horrible then....feel the same now.
8. How do we identify and keep the attackers at bay?
Where is there any security?
How come, each-time something sad happens,
so many of us feel sad, but then, move on???
Is it just okay to feel sorry and move on?
What should I do? I am lost again...
as I have my own home to take care of...
Mine are mine while I am also alive only.....
:-(
9. My dear son asks me why I am watching
a burning building with rapt attention...
What can I do dear one?
I am wondering...how much more we are to witness....
10. I miss being fearless.
I miss being careless.
I miss being happy.
Yes, matter of time, I would soon be fine again.
What about those for whom lots has changed...
for no fault of theirs?
11. Whose resignation would make what difference?
How do we identify the killers?
What can be done to catch the offender before the offence?
But Pappu Can't Catch Sala...........
Children's Day Update
As mum told my bro, we made Saku Hanuman again on sunday (a year later this time); he was little taller. That was the only difference from last time. He got 2nd place for Fancy dress for Children's Day celebrations of Journalist Colony.
Hanuman Ramp Walking
Posing With Mum - 1
Posing with Mum - 2
Had enrolled him for rhymes as well. Had made him practice One Two Buckle my shoe....and when he got the mike in his hand, he started, "Baa Baa Black Sheep...." Good thing was, he said that from start to end, without any problems. But we felt v funny that he didnt sing what rhyme he was prepared for, but something else that came to his head.
I was glad, he did this. He can do this only so long as he is a kiddo. Isn't it? :-)))
Sahil Hanuman On Stage
Hanuman Ramp Walking
Posing With Mum - 1
Posing with Mum - 2
Had enrolled him for rhymes as well. Had made him practice One Two Buckle my shoe....and when he got the mike in his hand, he started, "Baa Baa Black Sheep...." Good thing was, he said that from start to end, without any problems. But we felt v funny that he didnt sing what rhyme he was prepared for, but something else that came to his head.I was glad, he did this. He can do this only so long as he is a kiddo. Isn't it? :-)))
Over-Independent Times!
I watch my little fellow try to be the "Big Boy" he longs to be.
His Shirt Button frustration, T shirt stuck in neck irritation, both legs in one side trouble, self-removal and success at that - wants to display the newly-acquired skills!!
Wants to wear the socks by himself, wears the bag and goes down stairs - refusing to let me help or hold his hand...., sits on the bike by himself - sometimes even before I sit!
Best is - When he is frustrated, he says, I want to be a baby. :-))
His Shirt Button frustration, T shirt stuck in neck irritation, both legs in one side trouble, self-removal and success at that - wants to display the newly-acquired skills!!
Wants to wear the socks by himself, wears the bag and goes down stairs - refusing to let me help or hold his hand...., sits on the bike by himself - sometimes even before I sit!
Best is - When he is frustrated, he says, I want to be a baby. :-))
Monday, November 10, 2008
Images from My Onsite Trip
Lost at the Bay
Flowers
The Wet Path...
Hotel - Full Shot
Flowers Again...
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Things I Know Were Wonderful
- The Hotel room/Heater/Iron/kitchen (a home away from home in a way. It was even called the "Homewood Suites"!!)
- Having a nice colleague from the same place (office) as a companion (whom I could relate to if I felt lost!)
- The longing to return where I belong (this was a nice feeling as it reminded me of all the love I treasure and yet take for granted sometimes!)
- Cooking rice in microwave, making papads as well!
- My struggle for heating water, when I could have just taken the same from the tap!
- The long walks in the evening (those were mind-refreshing as I always ended up thinking - this kind of day-ending relaxation is something we must bring back into our busy routine)
- The Bay near the Hotel. I just loved the water stretch, though we could not go boating...watching the water morn and eve was itself nice.
- Stay at Malar's place - This was even better than I had imagined! Felt just like family and forgot that we were ex-colleagues once upon a time! Not just Malar, her hubby Baks is a nice person to bond with and no wonder, they make as happy a couple as Jeshee and me. :-)) (yeah, am smiling!)
- Cooking with Malar, shopping with them and best of all, Playing Poker with them and their friends!! My first time, though I wished we had more time for that again! Moreover, I won but they say, Poker is a Beginner's Game. The Beginner always wins!! Hehee. :-) We were talking about betting 5$ each and I suggested we start with 5 Rupees. (We didn't eventually bet money....) When I won, I wished we had bet Dollars!
- Team Lunch and another Team Lunch as Offsite with just the Doc Team - Ted, Kavitha and Me. I just wish, we had a much longer time to just while away :-)))
- My Lunch Outing with Bill (my ex-manager). We chatted for almost 3 hours and it was very nice. :-))
- How could I forget this??? When I went out with my friends for Dinner, we witnessed a cute young fellow proposing to his fresh-looking girl friend and the entire episode was so lovely. The guy had got the "Will you marry me?" put into the Fortune Cookie that they had after dinner. :-)) The place was a cosy eat-out and it was a lovely experience to see the girl say, "yes, yes, yes!" slowly, hesitatingly and then so excitedly!! It was very obvious that both of them were happy to be starting out together out of the hotel. She showed around the ring he gifted her...and for a moment, I wished I could capture the scene. I didn't however. I was new to the place. We heard them say they will be married before a year. I only could wish them well... :-))
The Not-So-Good Times
- Missing family - (esp Saku) - my baby without whom I haven't slept a single night since last 3 years 4 months.
- Wanting to see/know/feel everything with both of them (J & S)
- Imagining how Saku would behave at everything I could see.
- Talking about Saku.
- Feeling bad/glad entering hotel, leaving hotel, entering malar's place, leaving malar's place.
- On way back, finding myself all alone in that BIG waiting hall!
- The long shopping - time and effort.
- Having to think for myself. :-)
- Having lot of time to think many past things... and sometimes, doing too much of thinking especially when it was time to go for an outing and I chose to stay back.
- My 7 a.m. Rush-around and being stuck in Office Lobby. Using Webex to send chat message about my location. :-( Attending the meeting (minus the audio) but waiting for someone to let me into the office.
- The Iron Stand tucked away in a small compartment and me feeling like Mrs Bean while taking it out and dreading to put it back in!!
My Thoughts on My Trip
When I looked at old people travelling with great discomfort, conversing in a language that is new to them - in a way - though they are knowledgeable.. I was glad, I would not have to make my first trip abroad with trepidation - years later - if my son goes and settles beyond boundaries. :-)
The thought that also came was, why is this trip so important in itself? For me and mine. First, this is not just my achievement (and when did we start counting achievements on the basis of such trips?) - it is the collective shower of all that I have collected so far. I imagined the reactions of my Grandma if she were with us physically and ditto for my dad as well. Chachiji would have told me, "Hooon tu aidi dooor jaana hai, thoday dina di gul hai. Tu fikar na kar, sab changa hoyega." (Now you are due for a long travel, just a matter of few days though. You don't worry, everything will be fine.) I am sure, my father would have proudly presented my trip as his own achievement. It is, that way, an achievement. Today, his children are equally capable to make a mark in their own way... that would have been a consolation to papa. I know, and so, I wish, he was here physically to ride on my blessings. :-(
Then comes my mother. Maybe because she is so much a part of me that I don't think twice that this means to her. I know, she is overjoyed. She feels she has played her part and all her hard-work (the toiling away day-in and day-out) has benefitted to educate us to be able to go beyond the boundaries. :-)) Yes mom. You are not the only one who thinks that way.
Okay, so, the family would have been happy with my good-luck. What about the family I have created and bonded with last few years? My Inlaws - they have been preparing themselves and me to be able to take the whole thing in my stride. They worry, they fear, they console and they raise my confidence time and again.
They understand (my mother-in-law and my mother) how difficult it is emotionally for me to leave sahil behind, though only for a few days. They can relate to the feelings only as a mother can. They know, without me saying it that every single day, I have had moments of pain when I have longed to hold my little son. I too know, the joy of holding him close, would also remain only as long as little he remains. The time is precious and the moments lost pain. Inspite of this, I went ahead and explored, what is there for all of us to gain? I surprised myself again, and again. I missed my son sometimes more than I wanted to, however, I was able to regain my composure and carry on with all that needed to be done. Moreover, I found time and reasons to smile and be happy. :-)) Overall, I lived a different life for ten days. Funny, isn't it?...
The most important one, no, two... One my hubby and two my son. Both of them adjusted with each-other and with my absence so well, that I feel nice knowing that I can count on my hubby to take care of his lovingly; without making it an obligation on me!
Professionally, I was more than satisfied. First came the Lunch Outing with my ex-manager - Bill (William Jackson). It was the very first time I met him and it didn't feel like that. :-)) That's because of the way he makes one feel comfortable. Sad, but the truth is, while he was talking of his children, his oldest daughter being older to me...I could almost hear my dad in his worries. :-( But yeah, we discussed so many other things and we thought may be we would meet again before I came back. Somehow, I didn't even find time to call him again, while I was there. However, I have mailed him now that I am back and settled.
Then, there were my team mates. All of them whom I met for the first time. I can say, they were nice with us and the meetings were good too. Ted especially was very sweet throughout our trip. He had even called to ask if we wanted him to pick us up on Sunday for lunch. I had to refuse as I was meeting Bill then. But yeah, the gesture had made us feel nice. :-) Another thing that greatly amused me was Richard telling us about his "Dance Tough Time" when he had visited India. It seems he told himself to imagine he was exercising! :-))
Strawberry Yoghurt - I remember putting it across somewhere earlier in my blog, that I "thought" I could never like the "Strawberry" flavour. I proved myself wrong on this trip. :-) I have been pleasantly surprised to note that I can eat even the strawberry if I savour the taste beyond the tip of my tongue! It may sound silly but the fact is, the thought of flavoured yoghurt would earlier make me go yucky in my stomach. As a kid, I could never understand how my sisters enjoyed the "sugary curds"...but, looks like, after having enjoyed "strawberry yoghurt", I have outgrown the 'taste restriction' as well.
Fork and knife - Yeah, it may make the reader think I was a villager once upon a time! :-)) The fact is, though I know the right way of using the fork and knife; it doesn't come as second nature. Maybe, its the lack of practice. Anyways, finally, I can pride myself upon achieving a reasonable degree of comfort with this as well. I can pierce almost anything with a plastic knife too! :-)
Jet Airways - Am smiling as I write this. It was "Jet Airways" years ago - whose "Cabin Crew" Interview I failed. It amuses me to recall what I had told my father about the interview. I had told my parents - "There were girls with short skirts and long slits and there was me - long skirt and short slit. Obviously, I was not the right choice for the style icons!" Way back, thats one way cabin crew was looked at. Of course, it didn't take me too long to understand that the confidence I enacted way back wasn't half as I felt...during the interview. It was just "trying something" for me then...
Yeah, what I want to put down is - the flights were good, cabin crew was also good. :-) (You think they might offer me some free flights!?!) By the way, I did 3 Feedback forms throughout the journey and one of those was really detailed (as that was the only one where I didn't have to select one of the four options and I could write what I wanted to.)
Music and Movies - Had fun listening to the songs that we enjoy back at home. (Tum Se Hi/Pehli nazar...) and watched Jodha Akbar/Taaray Zameen Par during my flights.
Seeing an American dressed in a typical as an Indian - In an Indian Outfit (Rajasthani more likely) - I was thinking about wearing my "Journalist" hat and interviewing her. What I managed to do was, almost hear her talk about her life to another lady. Looks like her son is growing up in India/ she makes frequent trips / hopes to settle in India some day, when she can probably bear up the heat months!
Found another lady with a black mangalsutra, dressed in a western attire, acknowledging and binding in similarity with her. I could relate to them as well. Its something different when you step out of the boundaries and bind yourself with something else altogether. Being foreigners, married to Indian men, both these women were relating to each other on more than one ground. :-)
The thought that also came was, why is this trip so important in itself? For me and mine. First, this is not just my achievement (and when did we start counting achievements on the basis of such trips?) - it is the collective shower of all that I have collected so far. I imagined the reactions of my Grandma if she were with us physically and ditto for my dad as well. Chachiji would have told me, "Hooon tu aidi dooor jaana hai, thoday dina di gul hai. Tu fikar na kar, sab changa hoyega." (Now you are due for a long travel, just a matter of few days though. You don't worry, everything will be fine.) I am sure, my father would have proudly presented my trip as his own achievement. It is, that way, an achievement. Today, his children are equally capable to make a mark in their own way... that would have been a consolation to papa. I know, and so, I wish, he was here physically to ride on my blessings. :-(
Then comes my mother. Maybe because she is so much a part of me that I don't think twice that this means to her. I know, she is overjoyed. She feels she has played her part and all her hard-work (the toiling away day-in and day-out) has benefitted to educate us to be able to go beyond the boundaries. :-)) Yes mom. You are not the only one who thinks that way.
Okay, so, the family would have been happy with my good-luck. What about the family I have created and bonded with last few years? My Inlaws - they have been preparing themselves and me to be able to take the whole thing in my stride. They worry, they fear, they console and they raise my confidence time and again.
They understand (my mother-in-law and my mother) how difficult it is emotionally for me to leave sahil behind, though only for a few days. They can relate to the feelings only as a mother can. They know, without me saying it that every single day, I have had moments of pain when I have longed to hold my little son. I too know, the joy of holding him close, would also remain only as long as little he remains. The time is precious and the moments lost pain. Inspite of this, I went ahead and explored, what is there for all of us to gain? I surprised myself again, and again. I missed my son sometimes more than I wanted to, however, I was able to regain my composure and carry on with all that needed to be done. Moreover, I found time and reasons to smile and be happy. :-)) Overall, I lived a different life for ten days. Funny, isn't it?...
The most important one, no, two... One my hubby and two my son. Both of them adjusted with each-other and with my absence so well, that I feel nice knowing that I can count on my hubby to take care of his lovingly; without making it an obligation on me!
Professionally, I was more than satisfied. First came the Lunch Outing with my ex-manager - Bill (William Jackson). It was the very first time I met him and it didn't feel like that. :-)) That's because of the way he makes one feel comfortable. Sad, but the truth is, while he was talking of his children, his oldest daughter being older to me...I could almost hear my dad in his worries. :-( But yeah, we discussed so many other things and we thought may be we would meet again before I came back. Somehow, I didn't even find time to call him again, while I was there. However, I have mailed him now that I am back and settled.
Then, there were my team mates. All of them whom I met for the first time. I can say, they were nice with us and the meetings were good too. Ted especially was very sweet throughout our trip. He had even called to ask if we wanted him to pick us up on Sunday for lunch. I had to refuse as I was meeting Bill then. But yeah, the gesture had made us feel nice. :-) Another thing that greatly amused me was Richard telling us about his "Dance Tough Time" when he had visited India. It seems he told himself to imagine he was exercising! :-))
Strawberry Yoghurt - I remember putting it across somewhere earlier in my blog, that I "thought" I could never like the "Strawberry" flavour. I proved myself wrong on this trip. :-) I have been pleasantly surprised to note that I can eat even the strawberry if I savour the taste beyond the tip of my tongue! It may sound silly but the fact is, the thought of flavoured yoghurt would earlier make me go yucky in my stomach. As a kid, I could never understand how my sisters enjoyed the "sugary curds"...but, looks like, after having enjoyed "strawberry yoghurt", I have outgrown the 'taste restriction' as well.
Fork and knife - Yeah, it may make the reader think I was a villager once upon a time! :-)) The fact is, though I know the right way of using the fork and knife; it doesn't come as second nature. Maybe, its the lack of practice. Anyways, finally, I can pride myself upon achieving a reasonable degree of comfort with this as well. I can pierce almost anything with a plastic knife too! :-)
Jet Airways - Am smiling as I write this. It was "Jet Airways" years ago - whose "Cabin Crew" Interview I failed. It amuses me to recall what I had told my father about the interview. I had told my parents - "There were girls with short skirts and long slits and there was me - long skirt and short slit. Obviously, I was not the right choice for the style icons!" Way back, thats one way cabin crew was looked at. Of course, it didn't take me too long to understand that the confidence I enacted way back wasn't half as I felt...during the interview. It was just "trying something" for me then...
Yeah, what I want to put down is - the flights were good, cabin crew was also good. :-) (You think they might offer me some free flights!?!) By the way, I did 3 Feedback forms throughout the journey and one of those was really detailed (as that was the only one where I didn't have to select one of the four options and I could write what I wanted to.)
Music and Movies - Had fun listening to the songs that we enjoy back at home. (Tum Se Hi/Pehli nazar...) and watched Jodha Akbar/Taaray Zameen Par during my flights.
Seeing an American dressed in a typical as an Indian - In an Indian Outfit (Rajasthani more likely) - I was thinking about wearing my "Journalist" hat and interviewing her. What I managed to do was, almost hear her talk about her life to another lady. Looks like her son is growing up in India/ she makes frequent trips / hopes to settle in India some day, when she can probably bear up the heat months!
Found another lady with a black mangalsutra, dressed in a western attire, acknowledging and binding in similarity with her. I could relate to them as well. Its something different when you step out of the boundaries and bind yourself with something else altogether. Being foreigners, married to Indian men, both these women were relating to each other on more than one ground. :-)
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
My Trip-related Scribbles
18-Oct-08
First time in 3 plus years,
First time in Saku's lifetime...
My small boy has grown
as my First Flight has flown!
*****
Will I be thinking of you?
You Two - today...
are my only thoughts!
*****
Child for me,
Big Boy for dad.
Child for my mum, still -
am always missing my own dad.
*****
Clouds seem like Cotton Fluffs
From the plane's window.
*****
Hopes floating with clouds,
Reality seeping in.
I am what I am,
Because of my kith and kin!
*****
Times like these, when I am overjoyed;
There comes an underlying sadness.
I wish, so much was accomplished papa...
when you were besides, just here with us.
*****
I console myself as I see
the clouds passing around,
feel closer to you today...
than ever on the ground!!
*****
The mind wanders
to make surreal connections,
all at once -
with my own self!
and with the strangers,
searching for a common ground?
*****
26th Oct:
Going forward forgetting what is Ours,
here I see, someone trying
to keep the connection alive...
Life seems strange? It is.
*****
As I leave the homeyou have made yours,
I have the - "I am going to miss"
miserable feeling!!
*****
Haven't even been here too long
to know - "I am going sadly"...
is it to do with different time zones?
or some bonding entirely?
*****
So much to see
so much to understand,
each experience seems intriguing
to the barren mind,
in a new land.
First time in 3 plus years,
First time in Saku's lifetime...
My small boy has grown
as my First Flight has flown!
*****
Will I be thinking of you?
You Two - today...
are my only thoughts!
*****
Child for me,
Big Boy for dad.
Child for my mum, still -
am always missing my own dad.
*****
Clouds seem like Cotton Fluffs
From the plane's window.
*****
Hopes floating with clouds,
Reality seeping in.
I am what I am,
Because of my kith and kin!
*****
Times like these, when I am overjoyed;
There comes an underlying sadness.
I wish, so much was accomplished papa...
when you were besides, just here with us.
*****
I console myself as I see
the clouds passing around,
feel closer to you today...
than ever on the ground!!
*****
The mind wanders
to make surreal connections,
all at once -
with my own self!
and with the strangers,
searching for a common ground?
*****
26th Oct:
Going forward forgetting what is Ours,
here I see, someone trying
to keep the connection alive...
Life seems strange? It is.
*****
As I leave the homeyou have made yours,
I have the - "I am going to miss"
miserable feeling!!
*****
Haven't even been here too long
to know - "I am going sadly"...
is it to do with different time zones?
or some bonding entirely?
*****
So much to see
so much to understand,
each experience seems intriguing
to the barren mind,
in a new land.
Remembering Little Things About My Trip
The things I want to write in detail about...having made my Onsite Trip. :-)) This is just a list to fuel my memory, incase it fades........
- The Going away (How it was to leave my son)
- How the Little One has been in my absence
- Courtesy
- Courtesy on road - the unavoidable comparison
- My hotel (pics of my room) - (mrs bean and many other such thots)
- My breakfast, lunch and dinner
- My commute to office, the view from my onsite colleague's desk
- Being a mom - though away (imagining responses/reactions, feeling emotional now and then, keeping the balance until I saw him again!)
- The Homecoming
- Just being me - Thinking and Thinking
- The "unemployed hours"
- Walks in the evening
- The latest technological stuff and me! (microwave, dish-washer, stove, heater, iron, iPods!)
- On the way - journey (sbi aunty, explorations of the kiosk, vomity me!)
- Home Truths! (role-reversal learnings)
- The Take-Aways
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
My Little Star
My dearmost Sahil. The Child who is very well-behaved for his age. Not much fussy, clean. :-)) Yet Playful and Daring like all other kids. His courage in Darkness and spirit of being fearless inspires me. He is observant and catches all the tiny details you may miss. Most loved is his unique style of repeating his parents actions or words - something that etches itself in the memory!Dew Drops from Another World
Its strange, how you can suddenly feel removed from all that you held so close, by just moving physically away! Being miles away, of course emotional strain would find a place for itself. Stranger as it may seem, the new life has made everything until now, look like a story. I have this funny feeling that like a leaf, I have flown away with the wind and though I know I would be back near the roots where I belong... the feeling is very different from anything experienced so far.
Everything that I am noticing around me, having so much more time now just for myself as well... I am kind of feeling lost. :-( I don't feel out of place and that's good (so far) but then, why is there so much of a longing to just get where I was before this? Comfort? I don't know if Comfort is the right word. Familiarity? No. Togetherness? :-) Maybe.
More in the next post...there is so much to jot down. Most of it, I have already sent across back home, still, there is so much to savour in, just for myself. Its good that my son is taking it all in his stride (in a way, better than I am able to). This comfort shall help me survive! :-))
So, that said to myself, while I am here, am trying to make the most of it. New Place, New People, New Things, New Experiences, New Learnings. So far, nothing bad. Missing my father the most, coz I know what this would have meant to him. Seeing kids soar, does wonders to the parent's spirit, doesn't it? :-(
The thought that I had while on the plane - am closer to the clouds than ever before! When life has so much to give, why put in so much of thought? Go on Girl, the Journey will teach its lessons on the way.
Everything that I am noticing around me, having so much more time now just for myself as well... I am kind of feeling lost. :-( I don't feel out of place and that's good (so far) but then, why is there so much of a longing to just get where I was before this? Comfort? I don't know if Comfort is the right word. Familiarity? No. Togetherness? :-) Maybe.
More in the next post...there is so much to jot down. Most of it, I have already sent across back home, still, there is so much to savour in, just for myself. Its good that my son is taking it all in his stride (in a way, better than I am able to). This comfort shall help me survive! :-))
So, that said to myself, while I am here, am trying to make the most of it. New Place, New People, New Things, New Experiences, New Learnings. So far, nothing bad. Missing my father the most, coz I know what this would have meant to him. Seeing kids soar, does wonders to the parent's spirit, doesn't it? :-(
The thought that I had while on the plane - am closer to the clouds than ever before! When life has so much to give, why put in so much of thought? Go on Girl, the Journey will teach its lessons on the way.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
My Biggg Boy's Huge Attitude
1. When asked if he would be able to stay with his dad alone, when mumma goes away for few days; Saku says, "No Promlem (problem). Sahil not cry. Sahil big boy know."
2. If sahil and I have had a disagreement, I must not be the one to say that I won't speak to him. He makes a face and says, "U not say, mumma. Sahil say, sahil not talk to you. Sahil not give you coloring alcho."
3. When he is about to jump from somewhere I fear is little too high, he still jumps. After landing without any broken bones and teeth, he tells me, "I not break my teeth. I not break my bones alcho. I not got blood alcho." :-) He is so happy to have had his way and also, having proved me wrong. I just console myself and say, "I am so happy, you didn't get hurt." Afterall, that's what matters right?
4. While preparing him for his First Terminal Exams, as I sit and point at the Pictures in the book, expecting him to identify them, Sahil announces - "Mumma, I am Ma'am. Give me bukk, I ask, you tell. okay?" Before I can react, he has the book and starts questioning. Best is, as I answer correctly, he acts as if he is happy with my answer and tells me, "Wait. Let me put TICK." and proceeds to act as if he is ticking the pictures I have answered :-)
5. Off late, between my change of job, I have been discussing about my ex-manager (SM) to my
hubby or mother. As I joined the new office, I asked Sahil that night, "Do you know what is the name of mummy's new office?" My son, puffing his chest as if he knows the right answer (I had told him the name sometime) tells me, "Yes, I know. Sanjay Mandal." I was amused with his quick response. :-)
6. The other night, while I was cutting Ladies Fingers for the next day's lunch, my son wanted to help me. As I don't allow him to independently hold the knife, he tried shifting the cut ladies finger into another bigger vessel kept aside. While transferring it off the cutting plate, I told him not to use his fingers. He picked the "cutting plate" and swooshed the vegetables into the vessel, announcing, "Crane taking kachra and putting it garbage lorry." :-) Mum and I were amused at his connection to Crane and Lorry. :-))
7. Having seen his dad keep his car sparkling clean at all times, on spotting a muddy car on the road, my son tells me, "Mumma see. That uncle not cleaning his car know. So dirty. Why mumma he not keep it clean?"
8. This one is too good. Sometimes, when I have had to speak to a colleague when I am at home with sahil, I have told him, 'its my Boss." to enforce his volume low and no disturbance discipline. The other day, he mimicks me so well - "Hello, yes, yes, okay, one minute." Then he turns towards me and says in a hushed tone, "Mumma, I am talking to my Boss. Please don't make noise." I burst out laughing and he adds authenticity to his admonishings by saying, "I told you know, I am talking on the phone." :-( I act as if I am sorry at my bad behaviour and put fingers on my mouth and watch him finish his so called Call. :-)
9. I am sure he does not know what "Boring" means. He stil used it when I was asking him to repeat writing certain alphabets. :-( If studies are boring at 3...what wud he be!?!
10. Found one way to make it interesting. I have told him, he can use color pencils to write letters or numbers in the rough note. :-)) He likes it temporarily.
11.I was hiding a second chocolate bar..and he tells me, "mumma, tell me truth." I gave in.
I explained, I was playing and not lying. Had tough time convincing him.
2. If sahil and I have had a disagreement, I must not be the one to say that I won't speak to him. He makes a face and says, "U not say, mumma. Sahil say, sahil not talk to you. Sahil not give you coloring alcho."
3. When he is about to jump from somewhere I fear is little too high, he still jumps. After landing without any broken bones and teeth, he tells me, "I not break my teeth. I not break my bones alcho. I not got blood alcho." :-) He is so happy to have had his way and also, having proved me wrong. I just console myself and say, "I am so happy, you didn't get hurt." Afterall, that's what matters right?
4. While preparing him for his First Terminal Exams, as I sit and point at the Pictures in the book, expecting him to identify them, Sahil announces - "Mumma, I am Ma'am. Give me bukk, I ask, you tell. okay?" Before I can react, he has the book and starts questioning. Best is, as I answer correctly, he acts as if he is happy with my answer and tells me, "Wait. Let me put TICK." and proceeds to act as if he is ticking the pictures I have answered :-)
5. Off late, between my change of job, I have been discussing about my ex-manager (SM) to my
hubby or mother. As I joined the new office, I asked Sahil that night, "Do you know what is the name of mummy's new office?" My son, puffing his chest as if he knows the right answer (I had told him the name sometime) tells me, "Yes, I know. Sanjay Mandal." I was amused with his quick response. :-)
6. The other night, while I was cutting Ladies Fingers for the next day's lunch, my son wanted to help me. As I don't allow him to independently hold the knife, he tried shifting the cut ladies finger into another bigger vessel kept aside. While transferring it off the cutting plate, I told him not to use his fingers. He picked the "cutting plate" and swooshed the vegetables into the vessel, announcing, "Crane taking kachra and putting it garbage lorry." :-) Mum and I were amused at his connection to Crane and Lorry. :-))
7. Having seen his dad keep his car sparkling clean at all times, on spotting a muddy car on the road, my son tells me, "Mumma see. That uncle not cleaning his car know. So dirty. Why mumma he not keep it clean?"
8. This one is too good. Sometimes, when I have had to speak to a colleague when I am at home with sahil, I have told him, 'its my Boss." to enforce his volume low and no disturbance discipline. The other day, he mimicks me so well - "Hello, yes, yes, okay, one minute." Then he turns towards me and says in a hushed tone, "Mumma, I am talking to my Boss. Please don't make noise." I burst out laughing and he adds authenticity to his admonishings by saying, "I told you know, I am talking on the phone." :-( I act as if I am sorry at my bad behaviour and put fingers on my mouth and watch him finish his so called Call. :-)
9. I am sure he does not know what "Boring" means. He stil used it when I was asking him to repeat writing certain alphabets. :-( If studies are boring at 3...what wud he be!?!
10. Found one way to make it interesting. I have told him, he can use color pencils to write letters or numbers in the rough note. :-)) He likes it temporarily.
11.I was hiding a second chocolate bar..and he tells me, "mumma, tell me truth." I gave in.
I explained, I was playing and not lying. Had tough time convincing him.
Bro Misses Sahil
The things my bro remembers, now that he is little away from saku...
1. When perplexed with something that anyone else (me and bro, me and mum, me and hubby) are discussing, Saku asks, "Wat Huppenedddd?" and is never satisfied until he hears the whole story two times!
2. Saku used to search for mamu soon after entering nani's home. Now that bro isn't there, but one day when he spotted the bike, he searched for his maamu. :-( Had tough time convincing him that mamu isn't there at home.
3. When talking of sharing something with his dad, he recalls, "ammaama, accchacha, mamu alcho". :-)
1. When perplexed with something that anyone else (me and bro, me and mum, me and hubby) are discussing, Saku asks, "Wat Huppenedddd?" and is never satisfied until he hears the whole story two times!
2. Saku used to search for mamu soon after entering nani's home. Now that bro isn't there, but one day when he spotted the bike, he searched for his maamu. :-( Had tough time convincing him that mamu isn't there at home.
3. When talking of sharing something with his dad, he recalls, "ammaama, accchacha, mamu alcho". :-)
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